Famous Quotes & Sayings

Umberto Eco

A transposable aphorism is a malaise of the urge to be witty, or in other words, a maxim that is untroubled by the fact that the opposite of what it says is equally true so long as it appears to be funny.

Truman Capote

The good thing about masturbation is that you don't have to get dressed up for it.

Woody Allen

Curiosity, that's what kills us. Not muggers or all that bullshit about the ozone layer. It's our own hearts and minds.

Woody Allen

What if the worst is true? What if there's no God, and you only go around once, and that's it? Don't you want to be a part of the experience? You know, what the hell? It's not all a drag, and I'm thinking to myself: Geez! I should stop ruining my life searching for answers I'm never gonna get and just enjoy it while it lasts. And, you know, after-who knows? Maybe there is something, nobody really knows. I know that maybe is a very slim reed to hang your whole life on, but that's the best we have.

Woody Allen

I have no idea what I am doing but incompetence has never prevented me from plunging in with enthusiasm.

Woody Allen

Your self-esteem is a notch below Kafka.

Robyn Carr

Count on Jill Shalvis for a witty, steamy, unputdownable love story.

Virginia Woolf

Old Madame du Deffand and her friends talked for fifty years without stopping. And of it all, what remains? Perhaps three witty sayings. So that we are at liberty to suppose either that nothing was said, or that nothing witty was said, or that the fraction of three witty sayings lasted eighteen thousand two hundred and fifty nights, which does not leave a liberal allowance of wit for any one of them.

Samuel Goldwyn

They stayed away in droves.

David Daniels

He's got to be smarter with his pitches.

Mel Gardner

He wasn't overpowering like he usually is. He wasn't throwing as hard, but he pitched a smart game.

Robbie Coltraine

Crows are incredibly smart. They can be taught five things on the drop.

Truman Capote

Lively, too. Talky as a jaybird. With something smart to say on every subject: better than the radio.

Rick Riordan

He had no idea where the stereotype of dumb giggly blondes came from. Ever since he'd met Annabeth at the Grand Canyon last winter,when she'd marched toward him with that Give me Percy Jackson or I’ll kill you expression, Leo had thought of blondes as much too smart and much too dangerous.

Tucker Max

I was stupid when I was 17 or 18. My thought process was that I thought that I was legitimately a hyper-genius, and so I wanted to go to the hardest academic school I could to see if I was really as smart as I thought I was.

Tucker Carlson

Politicians are interesting people, most of them are smart and hard-working-I mean, they keep schedules no one else would think of keeping. Some of them live down to the caricature, but most of them are good people and they are charming.

Roger Ailes

I think I have a good eye for talent. I think I'm smart enough to figure out what the mission is and achieve it. I achieve it by hiring good people.

Robert Sean Leonard

I was proud of 'House, MD,' and I think it was good for what it was and remarkably smart for a television show. I loved Hugh Laurie and was proud to be by his side that long and to be trusted by him.

Kelly Hu

Being Asian where you're supposed to be more quiet and softer and I was always getting reprimanded for laughing to loud or speaking to loudly.

Romeo Dallaire

There was no way to laugh anymore, to love, to care, and there was a sense of guilt in having survived when others had been killed. I turned into a worse workaholic than I had already been by trying to work myself into the ground.

Tyler Perry

I want to be remembered as a guy who inspired, encouraged and made people laugh.

Willie Aames

I lived to make Scott Baio laugh.

William Saroyan

I have always been a Laugher, disturbing people who are not laughers, upsetting whole audiences at theatres... I laugh, that's all. I love to laugh. Laugher to me is being alive. I have had rotten times, and I have laughed through them. Even in the midst of the very worst times I have laughed.

Whitney Cummings

I have so much to be thankful for. I work with the most amazing people, get to make people laugh for a living and have the most amazing friends. But, I am mostly thankful for Spanx.

Whitney Houston

Sometimes you'll laugh. Sometimes you'll cry. Life never tells us, the when's or why's. When you've got friends, to wish you well. You'll find your point when. You will exhale.

Walton Goggins

I'm not good at telling a joke, but I can say a line in a certain way that makes people uncomfortable because they don't know whether to laugh or not, and I love that comedy.

Wanda Sykes

A woman would pitch a joke. Nothing. Then a guy would pitch it and everybody would laugh.