Famous Quotes & Sayings

Al Capone

Vote early and vote often.

Baltasar Gracian

Many get the repute of being witty but thereby lose the credit of being sensible. Jest has its little hour, seriousness should have all the rest.

Dylan Moran

The characters can't be wittier than people are in real life. They have to be character witty

e. e. cummings

I'm living so far beyond my income that we may almost be said to be living apart.

Abraham Lincoln

Tell the truth and you won't have so much to remember

Andy Borowitz

It used to be that people could be painfully boring in private. Facebook changed all that.

Aesop

We hang the petty thieves and appoint the great ones to public office.

Albert Einstein

Knowledge is realizing that the street is one way; wisdom is looking in both directions anyway.

Dorothy Richardson

Women who are not living ought to spend all their time cracking jokes. In a rotten society women grow witty; making a heaven while they wait.

Arthur Conan Doyle

We had got as far as this, when who should walk in but the gentleman himself, who had been drinking his beer in the taproom and had heard the whole conversation. Who was I? What did I want? What did I mean by asking questions? He had a fine flow of language, and his adjectives were very vigorous.

Dennis Ritchie

The notion of a record is an obsolete remnant of the days of the 80-column card.

Edsger Dijkstra

PL/1, the fatal disease, belongs more to the problem set than to the solution set.

Chuck Norris

Men are like steel. When they lose their temper, they lose their worth.

Thomas Reed

One, with God, is always a majority, but many a martyr has been burned at the stake while the votes were being counted.

Suzanne Collins

No. Now, shut up and eat your pears.

Tom Robbins

America is a nation of 270 million people: 100 million of them are gangsters, another 100 million are hustlers, 50 million are complete lunatics, and every single one of us is secretly in show business. Isn't that fabulous?

George Mikes

If it is gay, ribald and lascivious night-life you are after, Israel is not the place for you. The night clubs you do find are nearer in spirit to a YMCA than to dens of iniquity.

George Carlin

One of the first things they teach you in Driver's Ed is where to put your hands on the steering wheel. They tell you put 'em at ten o'clock and two o' clock. Never mind that . I put mine at 9:45 and 2:17. Gives me an extra half hour to get where I'm goin'.

Brandon Sanderson

For now, I only wish to make a simple acknowledgement of the woman who held the power just before me. Of all of us who touched it, I feel she was the most worthy.

Auguste Rodin

The more simple we are, the more complete we become.

Ayelet Waldman

The Q I loathe and despise, the Q every single writer I know loathes and despises, is this one: 'Where,' the reader asks, 'do you get your ideas?' It's a simple question, and my usual response is a kind of helpless, 'I don't know.'

Brian Tracy

The better organized you are in the simple things, the more spontaneous and free you can be in the ore important things.

Brad Goreski

Putting on a new pair of glasses or sunglasses is a simple way to completely transform your look - just like a new hairstyle.

Jamie Farr

I tried to make it a simple as possible for people so they could pronounce my name.

Branch Rickey

The world’s not so simple anymore, I guess it never was. We ignored it, now we can’t.

Billy Corgan

If there was a simple ethic for the band, it was that we want to be able to do whatever we want to do.

Ludwig von Mises

The idea of Socialism is at once grandiose and simple. . .We may say, in fact, that it is one of the most ambitious creations of the human spirit, . . .so magnificent, so daring, that it has rightly aroused the greatest admiration. If we wish to save the world from barbarism we have to refute Socialism, but we cannot thrust it carelessly aside.