Jim Gaffigan
Jim Gaffigan
James Christopher "Jim" Gaffiganis an American stand-up comedian, actor, writer, voice-over artist, and author. His humor largely revolves around fatherhood, observations, and food. He is also regarded as a "clean" comic, using little profanity in his routines. He has had several successful comedy specials, including Mr. Universe and Jim Gaffigan: Obsessed, both of which received Grammy nominations. His memoir, Dad Is Fatand his most recent book, Food: A Love Story, are both published by Crown Publishers. He co-created and currently...
NationalityAmerican
ProfessionComedian
Date of Birth7 July 1966
CountryUnited States of America
I love the movie previews... you know... Why is it whenever you're watching a movie preview you always feel like you have to comment on it to the person you're with? 'Yeah... I'm not gonna see that movie. I'm gonna wait for that on VIDEO.' I mean when you think about it, it's just a commercial for the movie. You know, you never sit at home watching tv-- "Yeah... I'm not buying that cereal. I don't like cereals with raisins in 'em. ...What's your take on that commercial? Where you goin'?
It does piss me off when Angelina won't stop calling.
You wanna know how good bacon is? To improve other food, they wrap it in bacon.
Thanksgiving. It's like we didn't even try to come up with a tradition. The tradition is, we overeat. 'Hey, how about at Thanksgiving we just eat a lot?' 'But we do that every day!' 'Oh. What if we eat a lot with people that annoy the hell out of us?'
Whenever you correct someone's grammar just remember that nobody likes you.
In the end, the type of parent you are is going to be something that you carry with you. ... Having multiple kids, it's been a gift in a way. It's keeping the priorities straighter.
The only advantage to wearing glasses is that you can do that dramatic removal.
Anyone know if the shuttles to Hell will have Wifi? Asking for a friend.
I usually don't have a burger, a brat, and a steak but it is 4th of July. And I need the energy if I'm gonna start blowin crap up. It's what the founding fathers would want.
When our bed is made, it's covered in 40 pillows-like we're stockpiling ammo for the global pillow fight.
You could say that to the pope. I want to talk to you about Jesus. He'd be like, easy, freak.
It's amazing how email has changed our lives. You ever get a handwritten letter in the mail today? 'What the? Has someone been kidnapped?'
Whenever I'm out of town for at least a week, I feel like I should write a postcard or something, but you can be a genius, you try and write a postcard you come across like a moron anyway: 'This city's got big buildings. I like food. Bye.'
Jesus if you could cure our son's blindness that'd be great... And we'd love some shelves over there.