Zach Braff
Zach Braff
Zachary Israel "Zach" Braff is an American actor, comedian, director, screenwriter and producer. He is best known for his role as Dr. John Dorian on the television series Scrubs, for which he was nominated for the Primetime Emmy Award for Outstanding Lead Actor in a Comedy Series in 2005...
NationalityAmerican
ProfessionTV Actor
Date of Birth6 April 1975
CitySouth Orange, NJ
CountryUnited States of America
spots parking-spots parking
Women are like parking spots, the best ones are handicapped.
eugenics secret want
You want to know the secret of my success? Let me tell you about eugenics...
generations modern mines
I wouldn't call myself a modern Shakespeare, but Shakespeare was probably to his generation what I am to mine.
lessons apes planets
Didn't we learn our lesson from Planet of the Apes?
yellow blue faces
If we've learned anything, it's that the combination of yellow smiley faces and blue polyester vests are irresistible to the inbred.
daughter children cutting
I know that [Mike] Tyson talked about wanting to eat his opponent's children, but I don't think he ever had the balls to do it. I'm different - when I kidnapped Bill Lawrence's daughter, I cut off all of her fingers before sending my demands so that I wouldn't have to sit there and wait for him to ignore them. We worked things about about nine hours in, which is good because I ate her thumb as a midnight snack.
piano lessons want
I want to take piano lessons, I want to study at university, I want to travel, I want to do other parts, make another movie.
unconscious ifs
She can't say no if she's unconscious.
global-warming killing mankind
If global warming is such a bad thing, then why is it taking out all of mankind's competitors? It just seems to me that the less species are out there, killing all our Caribou, the better.
alright
Yea, he's alright...but he's no Zach Braff.
nike our-world needs
Sure, they are the future of our world. Nike and Reebok need more factory workers every day.
population population-control
Hitler was about population control.
holiday touching orphan
I love the holiday season, almost as much as I love touching myself in front of orphans.
toilets toilet-seat cold
Don't get me started on cold toilet seats.