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funny mom brother
When I finished high school, I wanted to take all my graduation money and buy myself a motorcycle. But my mom said no. See, she had a brother who died in a horrible motorcycle accident when he was 18. And I could just have his motorcycle. Anthony Jeselnik
funny technology people
I've invented Twofacebook, the antisocial network. You start being friends w/entire world & defriend people one by one. Andy Borowitz
funny stupid men
Men know everything - all of them - all the time - no matter how stupid or inexperienced or arrogant or ignorant they are. Andrea Dworkin
funny dog people
The more I see of the representatives of the people, the more I admire my dogs. Alphonse de Lamartine
funny humor snow
Not until I came to Canada did I realize that snow was a four-letter word. Alberto Manguel
funny stupid science
The majority of the stupid is invincible and guaranteed for all time. The terror of their tyranny, however, is alleviated by their lack of consistency. Albert Einstein
funny motivational inspiring
Too many of us look upon Americans as dollar chasers. This is a cruel libel, even if it is reiterated thoughtlessly by the Americans themselves.
funny hilarious education
Only two things are infinite, the universe and human stupidity, and I'm not sure about the former.
funny football distance
Cole should be scoring from those distances, but I'm not going to single him out. Alex Ferguson
science men gnats
Linnæus, setting out for Lapland, surveys his "comb" and "spare shirt," "leathern breeches" and "gauze cap to keep off gnats," with as much complacency as Bonaparte a park of artillery for the Russian campaign. The quiet bravery of the man is admirable. Henry David Thoreau
science fiction would-be
So I wrote what I hoped would be science fiction, I was not at all sure if what I wrote would be acceptable even. But I don't say that I consciously wrote with humour. Humour is a part of you that comes out. Robert Sheckley
science moon light
... finding that in [the Moon] there is a provision of light and heat; also in appearance, a soil proper for habitation fully as good as ours, if not perhaps better who can say that it is not extremely probable, nay beyond doubt, that there must be inhabitants on the Moon of some kind or other? William Herschel
science sky memorial
He broke through the barriers of the skies.
science space mystery
I have looked farther into space than ever a human being did before me.
science execution genius
Execution is the chariot of genius. William Blake
science discovery long
Truly the gods have not from the beginning revealed all things to mortals, but by long seeking, mortals discover what is better. Xenophanes
science scientist experiments
I am not a scientist. Ronald Reagan
science development may
The extraordinary development of modern science may be her undoing. Specialism, now a necessity, has fragmented the specialities themselves in a way that makes the outlook hazardous. The workers lose all sense of proportion in a maze of minutiae. William Osler
intelligent men genius
A man of genius can hardly be sociable, for what dialogues could indeed be so intelligent and entertaining as his own monologues? Arthur Schopenhauer