Famous Quotes & Sayings

Baruch Spinoza

He who seeks equality between unequals seeks an absurdity.

Oliver Goldsmith

Every absurdity has a champion to defend it, for error is always talkative

Kurt Braunohler

I was writing this really long joke about the smell of poop, and I was like, 'What am I doing with my life?' I started to think about why I was a comedian, and then I came up with a reason for existence, which is: inserting absurdity or stupidity into strangers' lives in order to make the world a better place.

T. J. Miller

Funny is as funny does, and funny puts on a walrus mask and slowly gyrates in a mall food court. I laugh at absurdity hardest, then stories, then observations, then bearded men on roller skates.

Elfriede Jelinek

was made into an award-winning film, ''for her musical flow of voices and countervoices in novels and plays that with extraordinary linguistic zeal reveal the absurdity of society's cliches and their subjugating power.

The whole town laughed at my great-grandfather, just because he worked hard and saved his money. True, working at the hardware store didn't pay much, but he felt it was better than what everybody else did, which was go up to the volcano and collect the gold nuggets it shot out every day. It turned out he was right. After forty years, the volcano petered out. Everybody left town, and the hardware store went broke. Finally he decided to collect gold nuggets too, but there weren't many left by then. Plus, he broke his leg and the doctor's bills were real high.

P. J. O'Rourke

When you pay a hospital bill, you're really paying two hospital bills - one bill for you because you have a job and/or insurance and can pay the hospital. and another bill, which is tacked onto your bill, to cover the medical expenses of someone who doesn't have a job and/or insurance and can't pay the hospital.

Calvin Coolidge

At first I intended to become a student of the Senate rules and I did learn much about them, but I soon found that the Senate hadbut one fixed rule, subject to exceptions of course, which was to the effect that the Senate would do anything it wanted to do whenever it wanted to do it.

Tony Abbott

We will be a consultative, collegial government. No surprises, no excuses. That's what you'll get under the Coalition.

Tony Abbott

Taxes will always be lower under a Coalition government

Tony Abbott

There is much to be said for an emissions trading scheme. It was, after all, the mechanism for emission reduction ultimately chosen by the Howard government.

Tony Abbott

The quality of government, I suppose, is determined not by what happens, but by how you react to what happens.

Tony Abbott

The Australian people expect the Government to govern, they don't expect it to make excuses.

Tony Blair

Ask me my three main priorities for Government, and I tell you: education, education, and education.

Tony Blair

In government you carry each hope; each disillusion. And in politics it's always about the next challenge.

Tony Blair

It is not an arrogant government that chooses priorities, it's an irresponsible government that fails to choose.

David Miller

The performance of the stock is going to come down to the movies. It's that simple. And there are no sequels in store for next year.

Carolina Kluft

Everything I do is geared towards improving my next performance.

Ben Horowitz

You can't worry about the mistakes, because you're going to make a lot of them. You've got to be thinking about your next move.