Famous Quotes & Sayings

Anthony Jeselnik

When I finished high school, I wanted to take all my graduation money and buy myself a motorcycle. But my mom said no. See, she had a brother who died in a horrible motorcycle accident when he was 18. And I could just have his motorcycle.

Ann Brashares

There are two kinds of people in this world. The kind who divide the world into two kinds of people and those who don't.

Ann Brashares

When your about to criticize someone walk a mile in thier shoes, that way when you criticize them you're a mile away from them and you have their shoes

Andy Borowitz

The only way to explain how some people dress for the airport is they think no one else will be there.

Andy Borowitz

Twitter is currently valued at $8 billion, or $1 for every hour it has wasted.

Andy Borowitz

Give a man a fish, and he will eat for a day. Give a man Twitter, and he will forget to eat and starve to death.

Andy Borowitz

Cars will soon have the Internet on the dashboard. I worry that this will distract me from my texting.

Andy Borowitz

Thanks to the Internet, people we might have only suspected of being idiots can now give us ample evidence.

Andy Borowitz

I've invented Twofacebook, the antisocial network. You start being friends w/entire world & defriend people one by one.

Art Buchwald

A bad liver is to a Frenchman what a nervous breakdown is to an American. Everyone has had one and everyone wants to talk about it.

Eckhart Tolle

If peace is really what you want, then you will choose peace.

Dr. Seuss

If you want to catch beasts you don't see every day, You have to go places quite out of the way, You have to go places no others can get to. You have to get cold and you have too get wet, too.

Dolly Parton

When I sit back in my rocking chair someday, I want to be able to say I've done it all.

Deval Patrick

I don't want to be a senator.

Derek Luke

I get to be in movies where it's mostly dialogue, and I want to be in something, that for me, feels like kickboxing.

Dean Heller

As someone who grew up in tough circumstances, I know that being on public assistance is not a spot that anyone wants to be in.

Amber Benson

I wouldn't want to forget anything, even the weird stuff and the bad stuff. It makes you who you are.

Amber Heard

For someone like me, who prefers to keep their life as private as possible, it was disconcerting to have to define so much about myself. I don't want to be labeled as one thing or another.