Related Quotes
funny technology people
I've invented Twofacebook, the antisocial network. You start being friends w/entire world & defriend people one by one. Andy Borowitz
funny humor snow
Not until I came to Canada did I realize that snow was a four-letter word. Alberto Manguel
funny humorous life-sucks
Maybe this world is another planet's Hell. Aldous Huxley
funny life men
I always say, 'Man, the Creator is preparing me for something. He's keeping the sun on me for some reason. He's keeping me aligned with that generation.' Because I genuinely love people, I love hip-hop, and I love using it as a tool to communicate and to create a better vibration. Life is short. I guess I'm lined up for a reason. Doug E. Fresh
funny humor band
Don't clap I'm not a jazz band for Christ's sake. Dylan Moran
funny humor opening-up
As long as the people who kinda wanna go kill other people are going to go kill other people who kinda wanna go kill other people, you're killing all the right people and opening up all the best parking spaces. Doug Stanhope
funny humor trying
I've jammed enough things up my own ass just trying to come on any amphetamine based narcotic.
funny humor alcohol
They should raise the alcohol age to 60, so at least you'd have something to look forward to at this point.
funny cancer humor
All illegal narcotics are medicinal. Boredom is a disease worse than cancer. Drugs cure it, with little or no side effects if used as directed. Life's temporary for a reason, it gets boring after awhile. You should be inventing new drugs is what you should be doing! Newer, crazier drugs... and more holes, that's what you ladies need!
winning keys celebrate
Learning to celebrate success is a key component of learning how to win in the market. Douglas Conant
winning whatever-it-takes ifs
Whatever I can do to win, I'll do it, even if I have to get hit by a pitch, whatever it takes. Dontrelle Willis
winning mad wish
I've turned over a new leaf. On TV, Kenny Wallace said I was a pessimist after Charlotte, so I got mad. Now I am so excited about coming back that I just can't stand it. I wish we were starting tomorrow and I'm going to win! That's the new me. Mark Martin
winning sometimes loses
Sometimes you win, sometimes you lose, sometimes you get rained out. Satchel Paige
winning goal gold
I definitely want to win a gold medal, that should be everybody's goal. Laura Wilkinson
winning men isis
Jeb Bush gave a speech yesterday. He had a pretty rough time. He accidentally said that ISIS has 200,000 men instead of 20,000, and then he mispronounced the name of the terrorist group Boko Haram. So if history has taught us anything, Jeb is well on his way to winning the White House. Jimmy Fallon
winning matter win-or-lose
I can't say, 'It doesn't matter if you win or lose.' It's not true. You go in to win. Katarina Witt
winning gold olympics
The ability to manage large assets well - it's like being Michael Jordan or winning the gold in the Olympics; it's what you aspire to. Louis Bacon
winning leaving black
Win walked over to me. He held out his palm. In the middle of it was a single black sequin from the dress Scarlet had lent me. "You lost this," he said. I giggled, slightly embarrassed to be leaving bits of myself behind. "I'm shedding. Gabrielle Zevin
doors darkness perception
There are things of such darkness and horror—just, I suppose, as there are things of such great beauty—that they will not fit through the puny human doors of perception. Stephen King
doors doctors torchwood
I'm afraid the 'Doctor Who' door is probably closed because of me being in 'Torchwood.' Burn Gorman
doors dancing rooms
I have the picture of Barack [Obama] and me dancing right outside of my dressing room door, I see it every single day, and it makes me very happy. Ellen DeGeneres
doors musical way
I'm not shutting doors on myself, in any way, within theater, musical theater, TV and film. Lara Pulver