Related Quotes
funny mom brother
When I finished high school, I wanted to take all my graduation money and buy myself a motorcycle. But my mom said no. See, she had a brother who died in a horrible motorcycle accident when he was 18. And I could just have his motorcycle. Anthony Jeselnik
funny technology people
I've invented Twofacebook, the antisocial network. You start being friends w/entire world & defriend people one by one. Andy Borowitz
funny stupid men
Men know everything - all of them - all the time - no matter how stupid or inexperienced or arrogant or ignorant they are. Andrea Dworkin
funny dog people
The more I see of the representatives of the people, the more I admire my dogs. Alphonse de Lamartine
funny humor snow
Not until I came to Canada did I realize that snow was a four-letter word. Alberto Manguel
funny stupid science
The majority of the stupid is invincible and guaranteed for all time. The terror of their tyranny, however, is alleviated by their lack of consistency. Albert Einstein
funny motivational inspiring
Too many of us look upon Americans as dollar chasers. This is a cruel libel, even if it is reiterated thoughtlessly by the Americans themselves.
funny hilarious education
Only two things are infinite, the universe and human stupidity, and I'm not sure about the former.
funny football distance
Cole should be scoring from those distances, but I'm not going to single him out. Alex Ferguson
witty memories kids
A long memory is the most subversive idea in America. A tautology is a thing which is tautological. A witty saying proves nothing, but saying something pointless gets people's attention. If your kids look like you, it's hereditory. If they look like the neighbor, it's the environment. Although golf was originally restricted to wealthy, overweight Protestants, today it's open to anybody who owns hideous clothing. Dave Barry
eyes failure good hold less needed nobody opinion team trophy
We had a good season, but it's still a failure to me. That's in my eyes, that's nobody else's opinion, that's my opinion because I know what it's like to hold the trophy at the end. But anything less than that is a failure to me. . . . When we needed it the most, we didn't get it. Their team was better. Rod Smith
eye confession terrible
Our eyes are full of terrible confessions. Anne Sexton
eye lilies world
When you told me you loved me," Lily's eyes widened when she looked at Lux, "You saved the world. Amanda Hocking
eye shining maids
you saw her fair, none else being by, Herself pois'd with herself in either eye; But in that crystal scales let there be weigh'd Your lady's love against some other maid That I will show you shining at this feast, And she shall scant show well that now seems best. William Shakespeare
eye sociology justification
I admit that the eyes of the intellectually and culturally lively tend to glaze over at the mere mention of sociology, often with ample justification. Richard Wall
eye witness
Nothing can be believed but what one sees, or has from an eye witness. Thomas Jefferson
eye blue opposites
I’m staring into chocolate eyes. although my brain is clouded and I’m dizzy, I know enough to register that chocolate is the opposite of blue. I don’t want blue. Blue confuses me too much. Chocolate is straight-forward, easier to deal with. Simone Elkeles
eye hands giving
The coward, afraid of the lash, with one hand wipes his eyes and gives with the other. Of what avail are such gifts? Swami Vivekananda
eye men quality
Women are beginning to lose their identity. They have jumped with teeth clenched, fists braced and eyes aglow, into the competitive man's world. They're losing the vibrant quality of femininity, the aura of mystery. Tony Curtis