Famous Quotes & Sayings

Chevy Chase

You may have read that I went to M.I.T. In 1982 I filled out a Who's Who survey with joking responses, and they never bothered to check the facts.

Connie Willis

Management cares about only one thing. Paperwork. They will forgive almost anything else - cost overruns, gross incompetence, criminal indictments - as long as the paperwork's filled out properly. And in on time.

Dennis Ritchie

Twenty percent of all input forms filled out by people contain bad data.

Conan O'Brien

President Obama filled out his March Madness bracket. You can tell Obama's mind is elsewhere because his top two picks were Israel and Iran.

Jeff Flake

Many of the earmark request forms are actually filled out by lobbyists and then just turned in by the member's staff to the appropriations committee.

Jeaniene Frost

We boarded the plane after boxing our stakes and knives and taking them to a FedEx carrier, airport security being so strict nowadays. In the section marked 'contents', Bones filled out 'Tofu'. God, but he had a sick sense of humor sometimes.

Aron Ralston

I was able to first snap the radius and then within another few minutes snap the ulna at the wrist and from there, I had the knife out and applied the tourniquet and went to task. It was a process that took about an hour.

Bertrand Russell

[There are m]oral precepts that we consider really important, such as 'don't pick your nose' or 'don't eat peas with a knife'. There may, for ought I know, be admirable reasons for eating peas with a knife, but . . . early persuasion has made me completely incapable of appreciating them.

Bebe Neuwirth

I have the greatest picture of Ted [Danson]. That was a big caper: There was one person [opening] the door with a butter knife and another person kicking the door in so I could get a photo. He's decapitated, but totally nude. And he's really well-endowed.

David Lange

My back is so scar-tissued that you couldn't find a place to slip a knife.

Dave Barry

Never lick a steak knife.

Charles Stuart Calverley

Go mad, and beat their wives; Plunge (after shocking lives) Razors and carving knives Into their gizzards.

Alanis Morissette

It's like 10,000 spoons, when all you need is a knife.

Charles Baudelaire

If rape or arson, poison or the knife Has wove no pleasing patterns in the stuff Of this drab canvas we accept as life - It is because we are not bold enough!

Catherynne M. Valente

If you want to kill yourself, do not use us as your knife.

Dave Barry

All the shopping malls and restaurants and airports are riddled with low-fidelity loudspeakers, which apparently have developed the ability to reproduce by themselves; these are all connected to a special programming service called Music That Nobody Really Likes, and you cannot get away from it.

Dave Barry

...Hell, which as every frequent traveler knows, is in Concourse D of O'Hare Airport.

Chris Brown

Out of all the airports that are out there only about 5 percent have commercial service.

David Walliams

All human life can be found in an airport.

Caitlin Moran

I feel in my bones that Lady Gaga is a true strident feminist and good for my soul - but how do I square this with the fact that she's constantly walking around in her bra and pants, even at, like, airports and stuff, where even nudists wear a fleece and linen drawstring trousers?

Carol Leifer

Oh my God, Kennedy Airport - what a mess - all over you with those dopey security questions. 'Did you receive any gifts from any unknown persons?' Buddy, the last thing I got from an unknown person was in the 80's.

Charles M. Schulz

I have a feeling that when my ship comes in I'll be at the airport.

Bill Maher

Sometimes I'm dragging my ass out to the airport at 8 a.m. on a Saturday and I'm wondering why I'm doing this, but once I walk on stage I know why...because I'm addicted.

Jami Attenberg

In its current incarnation in my life touring is a lot of airports and hotels and car services and only OK food.