Related Quotes
funny technology people
I've invented Twofacebook, the antisocial network. You start being friends w/entire world & defriend people one by one. Andy Borowitz
funny humor snow
Not until I came to Canada did I realize that snow was a four-letter word. Alberto Manguel
funny humorous life-sucks
Maybe this world is another planet's Hell. Aldous Huxley
funny successful
Nothing's funny about someone who's successful. Drew Carey
funny life men
I always say, 'Man, the Creator is preparing me for something. He's keeping the sun on me for some reason. He's keeping me aligned with that generation.' Because I genuinely love people, I love hip-hop, and I love using it as a tool to communicate and to create a better vibration. Life is short. I guess I'm lined up for a reason. Doug E. Fresh
funny humor trying
Look at his face. I bet his cornflakes try to crawl out of the bowl. Dylan Moran
funny humor band
Don't clap I'm not a jazz band for Christ's sake. Dylan Moran
funny humor hair
I can't relax here. These people have no pubic hair anywhere. We have pubic hair on the ceiling. Dylan Moran
funny moving humor
Beer must be made by food companies. It makes you wander the streets at 3 am looking for things to eat. "What's that, is it moving, get it!! It's a nun! FRY HER!! FRY HER!" Dylan Moran
sex animal people
People have always been animals when it comes to sex. But since the Internet, it's become really out of control, in my opinion. Andrew Dice Clay
sex female unfair
FEMALE, n. One of the opposing, or unfair, sex. Ambrose Bierce
sex children gay
There are some forty thousand children in California, according to the red brief, that live with same-sex parents, and they want their parents to have full recognition and full status. The voice of those children is important in this case, don't you think? Anthony Kennedy
sex confused feel-good
Sometimes I feel good, at times I feel used. Loving you darling, makes me so confused. Alicia Keys
sex dirty responsibility
That is supposed to be the rallying cry of women in the age of AIDS: no condom, no sex. But the dirty little secret is that the rallying cry is a whisper.... The great unspoken on the heterosexual AIDS front has been how behavior is still determined by the old psychosexual minuet of the sexes, the lack of responsibility in young men and of assertiveness in young women. Anna Quindlen
sex weakness over-it
I'd have to acknowledge that I have a weakness for the fairer sex - and I hope I never get over it. Chuck Robb
sex faithful important
Yet, if the most frequent sex and apparently the best sex is that between married partners who are faithful to one another, is there not a hint that affection might be an important aspect of sex? Even love? Andrew Greeley
sex book writing
A woman who writes commits two sins; she increases the number of books, and decreases the number of women. Alphonse Karr
sex book boys
A perverse nature can be stimulated by anything. Any book can be used as a pornographic instrument, even a great work of literature if the mind that so uses it is off-balance. I once found a small boy masturbating in the presence of the Victorian steel-engraving in a family Bible. Anthony Burgess
dad gold mine
My dad had the idea in 1963. As a promotion, it's been a gold mine ever since. Bobby Lee
dad son bonus
Thankfully, in my youth I had the best financial advisor a son could ask for: my dad Walter. When I got that first signing bonus in 1978, Dad took my cheque, announced, 'This is what we're going to do,' and bought an annuity with it. Wayne Gretzky
dad growing-up kids
Great pressure is put on kids who don't have dads to get out and make money, and make life easier for everybody. It was always, 'Hurry up, grow up, make money, there's no man to do it for us.' Tracey Ullman
dad seen
Our 17-year-old has never seen his dad without MS. Cheryl Peters
dad far food guess lived town worked
I had a working mother. She worked for IBM. My dad lived in another town - not very far away, but another town. So food was - I guess food was my friend. John Schneider
dad prayer believe
I whispered to Dad during Rosh Hashanah services, "Do you believe in God?" "Not really," he said. "No." "Then why do we come here?" He sucked thoughfully on his Tums tablet and put his arm around me, draping me under his musty woolen prayer shawl, and then shrugged. "I've been wrong before," he said. And that pretty much summed up what theology there was to find in the Foxman home. Jonathan Tropper
dad philadelphia guy
My dad was an architect, and he wasn't a rich guy, but in our little world in Philadelphia, he was famous. He loved to see his picture in the paper. I wanted to be more famous than him. Kevin Bacon
dad oklahoma cities
I was raised in Oklahoma. I was actually born in Tulsa, but I grew up in a small town on the west side of Oklahoma called Elk City on a farm, where my dad grew up, actually. Kelli O'Hara
dad doors hands
He bent, lips coming to mine and — 'Derek? Chloe?' It was Kit, opening the back door. Derek let out a low growl. 'Never fails.' I turned to Kit. 'How is she?' 'We’re going to take her back to the house now. She’s unconscious again.' 'Then we’ll walk back,' Derek said. 'Give you room in the van to lay her down.' His dad agreed and went back inside. As we walked toward the steps, I looked down at Derek’s hand, holding mine. 'No one’s around,' he said. 'And we can take the back way.' 'Good,' I said, and entwined my fingers with his. Kelley Armstrong