Famous Quotes & Sayings

Andy Borowitz

I've invented Twofacebook, the antisocial network. You start being friends w/entire world & defriend people one by one.

Alberto Manguel

Not until I came to Canada did I realize that snow was a four-letter word.

Aldous Huxley

Maybe this world is another planet's Hell.

Doug E. Fresh

I always say, 'Man, the Creator is preparing me for something. He's keeping the sun on me for some reason. He's keeping me aligned with that generation.' Because I genuinely love people, I love hip-hop, and I love using it as a tool to communicate and to create a better vibration. Life is short. I guess I'm lined up for a reason.

Dylan Moran

Don't clap I'm not a jazz band for Christ's sake.

Doug Stanhope

Jesus died for your sins. I'm doing it for your mere entertainment dollar.

Doug Stanhope

As long as the people who kinda wanna go kill other people are going to go kill other people who kinda wanna go kill other people, you're killing all the right people and opening up all the best parking spaces.

Doug Stanhope

What I've lost in years I've gained in wisdom. Bullshit, I haven't learnt one thing in the last 15 years that hasn't just depressed me more.

Doug Stanhope

I sometimes wonder if necrophiliacs are really into dead people or if they just enjoy the quiet.

Dave Barry

A long memory is the most subversive idea in America. A tautology is a thing which is tautological. A witty saying proves nothing, but saying something pointless gets people's attention. If your kids look like you, it's hereditory. If they look like the neighbor, it's the environment. Although golf was originally restricted to wealthy, overweight Protestants, today it's open to anybody who owns hideous clothing.

Libby Doggett

Pre-K is gradually being integrated into the K-12 education system nationwide. In a state that has so many great universities like Purdue, Indiana and Notre Dame, it's a shame (Indiana) won't do more to ensure its own children are better prepared to enter those schools with high quality pre-K.

Ogden Nash

Children aren't happy with nothing to ignore, and that's what parents were created for.

Charles Dyer

We feel very strongly about all children having an equal opportunity for education,

Lesleigh Drye

We got our favorite cookie and our favorite chocolate and our favorite nut mix. And then we got suckers to make our children happy.

Mona Simpson

We go to college, live together or marry, and have kids - often with little more thought to the daily routines of raising children than our grandparents gave them, when women by and large stayed at home.

Mark Finkelstein

We're very excited about this. This is a great thing for the children.

Nina Holland

Very young children can just not protect themselves as effectively as adults can.

Orson Scott Card

It's easy to manipulate your children when they're absolutely sure you're stupid.

Christine Mazier

You do your children a disservice if you don't find time for yourself. If you're always making sacrifices for them, they won't learn to respect your time as they grow.