Famous Quotes & Sayings

Dave Barry

Earnest is our dog. She senses instantly that something is wrong, and guided by that timeless and unerring nurturing instinct that all female dogs have, she tries to lick my ears off.

Dave Barry

Sometimes you panic and find yourself emitting remarks so profoundly inane that you would be embarrassed to say them to your dog. Your dog would look at you and think to itself, 'I may lick myself in public, but I'd never say anything as stupid as that.'

Dave Barry

Dogs would make totally incompetent criminals. If you could somehow get a group of dogs to understand the concept of the Kennedy assassination, they would all immediately confess to it. Whereas you'll never see a cat display any kind of guilty behavior, despite the fact that several cats were seen in Dallas on the grassy knoll area, not that I wish to start rumors.

Dave Barry

Dogs need to sniff the ground; it's how they keep abreast of current events. The ground is a giant dog newspaper, containing all kinds of late-breaking dog news items, which, if they are especially urgent, are often continued in the next yard.

Dave Barry

Magnetism is one of the Six Fundamental Forces of the Universe, with the other five being Gravity, Duct Tape, Whining, Remote Control, and The Force That Pulls Dogs Toward The Groins Of Strangers.

Eartha Kitt

Thank God I got the rejects. These animals are very, very affectionate.

Eartha Kitt

As you've witnessed, Catwoman is the ultimate diva. From the pages of comic books to both small and big screens, Catwoman continues to evolve and mature like a true cat. Catwoman, is a unique breed, never taking the same form twice. But whatever form she takes, she'll always reign supreme. A dog maybe man's best friend, but a cat is everyone's favourite feline fatale.

David Icke

We laugh at sheep because sheep just follow the one in front. We humans have out-sheeped the sheep, because at least the sheep need a sheep dog to keep them in line. Humans keep each other in line. And they do it by ridiculing or condemning anyone who commits the crime, and that’s what it’s become, of being different.

Audrey Hepburn

I'm half-Irish, half-Dutch, and I was born in Belgium. If I was a dog, I'd be in a hell of a mess!

Steven Gerrard

Wayne is like a dog on a lead at the minute and we can let him off on Wednesday,

Denzel Washington

Cats are too independent. They piss me off. They play when they want, and then they turn their back on you. Dogs, you throw the ball, and they bring it back, tongue hanging out, tail wagging. Cats are like "Not right now, too busy." Definitely a dog man. Except when it comes to cleaning up after them! Cats win that!

Denise Levertov

I thought I was growing wings— it was a cocoon. I thought, now is the time to step into the fire— it was deep water. Eschatology is a word I learned as a child: the study of Last Things; facing my mirror—no longer young, the news—always of death, the dogs—rising from sleep and clamoring and howling, howling.... ("Seeing For a Moment")

Deborah Norville

If you want to be liked, get a dog. The people you work with are not your friends.

Cory Smith

Where there was water, you would see packs of dogs swimming.

William Shakespeare

O villains, vipers, dogs, easily won to fawn on any man!

William Shakespeare

For oaths are straws, men's faiths are wafer-cakes, And hold-fast is the only dog.

William Shakespeare

Villains, vipers, damn'd without redemption; Dogs, easily won to fawn on any man; Snakes in my heart-blood warm'd, that sing my heart; Three Judases, each one thrice worse than Judas.

Steven Moffat

You could only draw conclusions about my personal sexual politics if you proceed from the assumption that I was presenting the characters as the way it is and the way it ought to be. But both are clearly defined as deranged – it’s love among the mad. He’s a psycopath, so is she. She’s prepared to throw him to the dogs until he works out the code, he’s prepared to let her nearly get executed. They’re not really going to buy a house and a Volvo together. I’m not saying this is how people should date!

Bill Mumy

I walk my dogs. I garden a little. I play a bit of tennis. Basically when I have spare time I'm making music.

Cassie Steele

I have two dogs and a parrot, so they require a lot of attention. They deserve it.

Agnes Repplier

A real dog, beloved and therefore pampered by his mistress, is a lamentable spectacle. He suffers from fatty degeneration of his moral being.

Agnes Repplier

He is your friend, your partner, your defender, your dog. You are his life, his love, his leader. He will be yours, faithful and true, to the last beat of his heart. You owe it to him to be worthy of such devotion. Our dogs will love and admire the meanest of us, and feed our colossal vanity with their uncritical homage.

Charles Lamb

For God's sake (I never was more serious) don't make me ridiculous any more by terming me gentle-hearted in print... substitute drunken dog, ragged head, seld-shaven, odd-eyed, stuttering, or any other epithet which truly and properly belongs to the gentleman in question.

Charles Lamb

A book reads the better which is our own, and has been so long known to us, that we know the topography of its blots, and dog's ears, and can trace the dirt in it to having read it at tea with buttered muffins.

Charlie Munger

In my life there are not that many questions I can't properly deal with using my $40 adding machine and dog-eared compound interest table.

Charles M. Schulz

All his life he tried to be a good person. Many times, however, he failed. For after all, he was only human. He wasn't a dog.

Bill Maher

Wichita Falls, Texas is considering using toilet water for drinking. And a dog there today said, 'White people's problems.'

Bill Maher

If we were a dog and God owned us, the cops would come and take us away.

Bill Maher

Oh, America! I could never leave you! You're like my dog, dumb as a post but you make me laugh!

Bill Maher

America is like a dog. I'm sorry, but it is. It cannot understand actual words. It understands inflection. It understands fear. But you can't actually explain issues to a dog.

Bill Maher

But I've often said that if I had – I have two dogs – if I had two retarded children, I'd be a hero. And yet the dogs, which are pretty much the same thing. What? They're sweet. They're loving. They're kind, but they don't mentally advance at all. Dogs are like retarded children.

Bill Maher

New Rule: Gay marriage won't lead to dog marriage. It is not a slippery slope to rampant inter-species coupling. When women got the right to vote, it didn't lead to hamsters voting. No court has extended the equal protection clause to salmon. And for the record, all marriages are "same sex" marriages. You get married, and every night, it's the same sex.

Beth Henley

The impetus behind going to graduate school was a year after graduating from college spent in Dallas working at the dog food factory and Bank America and not having met success in my chosen field, which at that point was being an actress.