Brian P. Cleary
Brian P. Cleary
Brian P. Cleary,is an American humorist, poet, United States patent holder, inventor and author. The bow-tie wearing children’s author is best known for his books that explore grammar in humorous ways written for grade-school children...
NationalityAmerican
ProfessionAuthor
Date of Birth1 October 1959
CountryUnited States of America
kids laughing bored
Kids enjoy laughing and are seldom bored when they find something funny. They also ask questions, often to adults, because they understand that the more words they can comprehend about a funny story or a joke, the more they'll enjoy it.
hearing littles blind
Not only is love blind, it’s a little hard of hearing.
good-friend gun helping
A good friend will help you plant your tulips. A great friend will help you plant a gun on the unarmed intruder you just shot.
cat thinking sheep
Our cat is kind dove shellfish, and thinks the world is hers, She finds a comfy spot and then we pet turtle sheep purrs.
book wind gone
You want a story? Read 'Gone With the Wind'. These aren't stories. They're joke books. The whole thing of a beginning, a middle and an end has been done to death.
names gossip persons
It’s not technically gossip if you start your sentence with “I’m really concerned about __________________ ,” (fill in the name of the person you’re not gossiping about).
corny perfectly
It's perfectly okay if you don't understand every single one of them. For one thing, I make a lot of corny jokes, and you have to be 40 years old to get some of them.
kids smell hands
When a kid says "smell my hand," it almost never smells like cinnamon.
cupcakes muffins consumed
Any cupcake consumed before 9AM is, technically, a muffin.
flames interesting stories
Whatever story you're telling, it will be more interesting if, at the end you add, "and then everything burst into flames.
real mean kids
When a kid can understand that a word can mean two things, there's some real thinking going on. They have a vested interest in finding out what a word means, because it's the punch line to a joke.
unnecessary sophisticated
I love the semicolon; it's unnecessary, but graceful and sophisticated.
book speech alphabet
I like all things grammatical, and I had already written several books about parts of speech, and even the alphabet, so everything that makes up a sentence and even a word was covered except for punctuation.
hate reading school
If I have a talent for making some fourth-grader who hates school and reading to hate it a little less, then I have to do the most with what I've been issued.