Dave Barry
Dave Barry
David McAlister "Dave" Barryis a Pulitzer Prize winning American author and columnist, who wrote a nationally syndicated humor column for the Miami Herald from 1983 to 2005. He has also written numerous books of humor and parody, as well as comedic novels...
NationalityAmerican
ProfessionJournalist
Date of Birth3 July 1947
CityArmonk, NY
CountryUnited States of America
government needs
Whatever the needs of the public are, the government responds to those needs by getting larger.
two needs experts
Experts agree that the best type of computer for your individual needs is one that comes on the market about two days after you actually purchase some other computer.
matter needs back-to-work
What I need is a search engine that, no matter what I type in, comes back with GO BACK TO WORK.
people needs musician
Classical music gradually lost popularity because it is too complicated: you need twenty-five or thirty skilled musicians just to hum it properly. So people began to develop regular music.
god stupidity needs
Trails need to be reconstructed. Please avoid building trails that go uphill.
mean needs warning
Technically, Windows is an "operating system," which means that it supplies your computer with the basic commands that it needs to suddenly, with no warning whatsoever, stop operating.
thinking needs fierce
I think I became funny because I grew up in the Bronx. I was small and weak and Jewish instead of large and fierce and Puerto Rican. You need something.
beer meals needs
Recently I began to feel this void in my life, even after meals, and I said to myself, "Dave, all you do with your spare time is sit around and drink beer. You need a hobby." So I got a hobby. I make beer.
technology looks needs
To better understand why you need a personal computer, let's take a look at the pathetic mess you call your life.
thinking
He could even think about how fast he was thinking about things.
teeth green hello
The porpoises said hello to Molly. She told them all her teeth were green.
long heaven humanity
As long as humanity has been human, it has looked toward the heavens and dreamed that some day, some way, there would be giant federal contracts involved.
secret secret-society
A secret society within a secret society.
captains hard
Nobody understands how hard it is, being a captain.