David Cross

David Cross
David Cross is an American stand-up comedian, actor, and writer, known primarily for his stand-up performances, the HBO sketch comedy series Mr. Show, and his role as Tobias Fünke in the sitcom Arrested Development. Cross created, wrote, executive produced, and starred in The Increasingly Poor Decisions of Todd Margaret, developed and had a prominent role in Freak Show, appeared on Modern Family, portrayed Ian Hawke in the Alvin and the Chipmunks film franchise, and voiced Crane in the Kung Fu...
NationalityAmerican
ProfessionTV Actor
Date of Birth4 April 1964
CityAtlanta, GA
CountryUnited States of America
I'm not a centrist, and there's nothing about me that's centrist. I never have been.
I did one of the worst shows for that kind of thing in Northampton, Massachusetts, which is one of the most liberal spots on the planet. There were numerous people who walked out, somebody had thrown a beer, I had people yelling and screaming.
I was in Antwerp - which, I had about 20 shows left at that point - and a guy said, "That's Dave Attell's." Also, Antwerp was my smallest audience, so the guy was right there. I was like, "What?" He said, "Dave Attell does a bit about, 'Why are there luggage stores in the airport?'" I had never seen that, and I would never ever, ever, ever - please believe me - I would never lift material from somebody ever, and certainly not knowingly.
I'm finally going to be able to finally criticize [Hillary Clinton] without being accused of being a sexist - that idea. I'm not a fan, I don't like her, but you can't say anything without being accused of being a sexist pig, which is unfair.
Maybe if you live in Brooklyn, you don't need to hear that? But please, trust me, in most of America, they do need to hear it. And they're quite thankful that somebody came out and did it. For an hour and a half in that theater, for once, they're in the majority.
There were a handful of shows that were just painful. Not many, but things where I just said going into it, "Why am I here? What am I doing?"
I'd say 95 percent of my audience was white. They were mostly kind of older hipster folks like myself.
I've gotten "condescending" a million times, and that's not good.
There's the disingenuous duplicitousness, but you can apply that to every politician, really.
I just did 101 shows in 86 different cities in America and Europe and Canada, and I'm not lying or exaggerating when I say, at the vast majority of shows, they loved it. There were encores, there were standing ovations.
I'm a professional comic. Whether you think I'm funny or not, that's, again, subjective.
Hopefully people will be reinventing comedy forever and ever. This is just what I do, and it's a type of comedy.
I do not want to encourage heckling and outbreaks at all.
I know Dave [Attel] and we're friendly, and I have nothing but respect for him.