George Burns
George Burns
George Burnswas an American comedian, actor, singer, and writer. He was one of the few entertainers whose career successfully spanned vaudeville, radio, film and television. His arched eyebrow and cigar-smoke punctuation became familiar trademarks for over three-quarters of a century. He and his wife, Gracie Allen, appeared on radio, television, and film as the comedy duo Burns and Allen...
NationalityAmerican
ProfessionTV Actor
Date of Birth20 January 1896
CityNew York City, NY
CountryUnited States of America
I'm very pleased to be here. Let's face it, at my age I'm very pleased to be anywhere.
If it's a good script I'll do it. And if it's a bad script, and they pay me enough, I'll do it.
This is the sixth book I've written, which isn't bad for a guy who's only read two.
Say Goodnight Gracie.
Money is the root of all evil.' Then we hear, 'A fool and his money are soon parted.' What are they talking about? If money is so evil, shouldn't it be, 'A wise man and his money are soon parted'? And another thing, how does a fool get money in the first place? I know some fools who have a lot of money, but they won't tell me how they got it, and I won't tell them.
I thought to myself, 'why not write a bestseller?' In the first place, more people buy them and more people read them. You make more money and it doesn’t take any more time to write a bestseller than it does to write a book nobody buys.
I was always taught to respect my elders and I've now reached the age when I don't have anybody to respect.
I'd say that about 82 percent of what I write is bad, but don't go by me; I'm as bad a judge as I am a writer. Look, if it were all good, you'd be paying twice as much for this book. So relax, read it, and if you don't enjoy it, remember that you're saving money.
There are many ways to die in bed, but the best way is not alone.
If I paid ten dollars for a cigar, first I'd make love to it, then I'd smoke it.
How did I ever get sick? I've already had everything.
I would read Playboy more often, but my glasses keep steaming up.
It's good to be here. At 98, it's good to be anywhere.
A married couple that plays cards together is just a fight that hasn't started yet.