If you're no longer growing together, you have to part ways and go on. I think that 'death do us part' is an archaic aspect of marriage. It's not really applicable. I think about my grandparents who were married for 60-odd years, but they hated each other. That was the custom then, and I don't really think that's the healthiest approach.
I would want to live together first. I didn't live with my first husband and I think if I had lived with him for just one month before marrying him, I wouldn't have. I would also say do premarital counseling.
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