Laurie Helgoe
Laurie Helgoe
Laurie Anne Helgoeis an American psychologist and author specializing in personality development and the psychology of desire. In 2008, her writing revealed that scholarly and popular accounts regarding humans who display the personality traits of introversion and extroversion were flawed, and that, instead of representing a 25-30% of the population, introverts make up 57% of the population. The identified flaw was a dated reliance on the early work of Isabel Briggs Myers, and the failure to note the latest comprehensive...
NationalityAmerican
ProfessionPsychologist
Date of Birth10 December 1960
CountryUnited States of America
Your nature is not the problem. The problem is that you have become alienated from your nature -- from your power source.
Introvert conversations are like jazz, where each player gets to solo for a nice stretch before the other player comes in and does his solo. And like jazz, once we get going, we can play all night. Extrovert conversations are more like tennis matches, where thoughts are batted back and forth, and players need to be ready to respond. Introverts get winded pretty quickly.
Quiet is might. Solitude is strength. Introversion is power.
Though introverts are drained by interaction, we can take immense pleasure in watching the scene around us.
Let's clear one thing up: Introverts do not hate small talk because we dislike people. We hate small talk because we hate the barrier it creates between people.
Extroverts want us to have fun, because they assume we want what they want. And sometimes we do. But "fun" itself is a "bright" word, the kind of word that comes with flashing lights and an exclamation point! One of Merriam-Webster's definitions of "fun" is "violent or excited activity or argument." The very word makes me want to sit in a dimly lit room with lots of pillows-by myself.
Reading is like travel, allowing you to exit your own life for a bit, and to come back with a renewed, even inspired, perspective.
Introverts paradoxically pull away from culture and create culture.
When an introvert is quiet, don't assume he is depressed, snobbish or socially deficient.
Introverts are more effective leaders of proactive employees. When you have a creative, energetic work force, an introvert is going to draw out that energy better.
Introverts like being introverts. We are drawn to ideas, we are passionate observers, and for us, solitude is rich and generative.
When an introvert cares about someone, she also wants contact, not so much to keep up with the events of the other person's life, but to keep up with what's inside: the evolution of ideas, values, thoughts, and feelings.
Introverts tend to internalize problems. In other words, we place the source of problems within and blame ourselves. Though introverts may also externalize and see others as the problem, it's more convenient to keep the problem "in house." Internalizers tend to be reliable and responsible, but we can also be very hard on ourselves.
For the introvert, conversation can be a very limited forum for self expression. When a song moves you, a writer gets you or a theory enlightens you, you and its creator are connecting in a realm beyond sight or speech.