Famous Quotes & Sayings

Anthony Jeselnik

When I finished high school, I wanted to take all my graduation money and buy myself a motorcycle. But my mom said no. See, she had a brother who died in a horrible motorcycle accident when he was 18. And I could just have his motorcycle.

Ann Brashares

There are two kinds of people in this world. The kind who divide the world into two kinds of people and those who don't.

Ann Brashares

When your about to criticize someone walk a mile in thier shoes, that way when you criticize them you're a mile away from them and you have their shoes

Andy Borowitz

The only way to explain how some people dress for the airport is they think no one else will be there.

Andy Borowitz

Twitter is currently valued at $8 billion, or $1 for every hour it has wasted.

Andy Borowitz

Give a man a fish, and he will eat for a day. Give a man Twitter, and he will forget to eat and starve to death.

Andy Borowitz

Cars will soon have the Internet on the dashboard. I worry that this will distract me from my texting.

Andy Borowitz

Thanks to the Internet, people we might have only suspected of being idiots can now give us ample evidence.

Andy Borowitz

I've invented Twofacebook, the antisocial network. You start being friends w/entire world & defriend people one by one.

Dennis Prager

It is easier to take a position in the abstract than when it hits home.

Amy Weber

I have always brought home stray animals - everything from squirrels to wild rabbits to foxes and turtles.

Alfred Nobel

Home is where I work, and I work everywhere.

Alfred Jarry

It is one of the great joys of home ownership to fire a pistol in one's own bedroom

Alexander Pope

You beat your Pate, and fancy Wit will come: Knock as you please, there's no body at home.

Alexa Chung

Looking effortless takes a lot of effort. When I get new Converse I dedicate some time at home to shoving mud on them so they don't look squeaky clean.

E. L. Konigsburg

Jamie, you know, you could go clear around the world and still come home wondering if the tuna fish sandwiches at Chock Full O'Nuts still cost thirty-five cents.

E. O. Wilson

Humanity is a biological species, living in a biological environment, because like all species, we are exquisitely adapted in everything: from our behavior, to our genetics, to our physiology, to that particular environment in which we live. The earth is our home. Unless we preserve the rest of life, as a sacred duty, we will be endangering ourselves by destroying the home in which we evolved, and on which we completely depend.

Donna Karan

I feel at home most places I go, but my very top of the list are Bali, Italy, and London. Those are like second homes to me.

Alan King

Comedy is an amazing calling. Once you get that first laugh, it's hard to turn away. Then, of course, you're hooked and you have to learn how to survive in the business.