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The states have a total of $80 billion in deficit spending. What are they going to have to do? Well, they are either going to have to cut programs, which will drag the economy down, or they are going to have to raise taxes, which will drag the economy down. Charles Schumer
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The whole town laughed at my great-grandfather, just because he worked hard and saved his money. True, working at the hardware store didn't pay much, but he felt it was better than what everybody else did, which was go up to the volcano and collect the gold nuggets it shot out every day. It turned out he was right. After forty years, the volcano petered out. Everybody left town, and the hardware store went broke. Finally he decided to collect gold nuggets too, but there weren't many left by then. Plus, he broke his leg and the doctor's bills were real high. 
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Germany, Japan and, to a lesser extent, Britain and Italy, were lifted out of the debris of war by the Americans who poured in billions of dollars and forgave other billions in debts.
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When you pay a hospital bill, you're really paying two hospital bills - one bill for you because you have a job and/or insurance and can pay the hospital. and another bill, which is tacked onto your bill, to cover the medical expenses of someone who doesn't have a job and/or insurance and can't pay the hospital. P. J. O'Rourke
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The transportation and the energy bill would have been a good place to go back and revisit for some of the spending that occurred there. Lindsey Graham
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Let me be clear -- the Congress will be writing the next farm bill in 2007 and I am deeply concerned the (Bush) administration is using the current negotiations to reshape farm policy without the full input of Congress and grassroots support, Saxby Chambliss
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One thing Billy taught me is to know how to handle the situation. I learned how to handle the situation, ... It's hard to know how to handle it. Octavio Dotel
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Is Bill Clinton serving as a lobbyist and public-relations guru to the government of Dubai? It sure looks like it. Dick Morris
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Unlike my opponent, I will not let oil companies write this country's energy plan, or endanger our coastlines, or collect another $4 billion in corporate welfare from our taxpayers. Barack Obama
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Sweet cream on an ice cream sandwich! Dwayne Johnson
funny humor spices
The plural of spouse is spice. Christopher Morley
funny crazy silly
A human being: an ingenious assembly of portable plumbing.
funny life witty
A man who has never made a woman angry is a failure in life.
funny fashion women
High heels were invented by a woman who had been kissed on the forehead.
funny thinking looks
I'm odd looking. Sometimes I think I look like a funny muppet. Angelina Jolie
funny team nba
We scored a season-high, yeah - albeit against a team that is somewhat tanking. Andrew Bogut
funny famous-inspirational fate
When fate hands us a lemon, let's try to make lemonade. Andrew Carnegie
funny wisdom intelligence
He that cannot reason is a fool. He that will not is a bigot. He that dare not is a slave.