Famous Quotes & Sayings

Adam Carolla

When Asian people grow up fast they go to college at 13. White people grow up fast it's about fudge packing and triple D's at 13.

Adam Carolla

I give women two types of orgasms. Fake and none.

Adam Carolla

I've never not finished a masturbatory session or a pizza. Those are the two things I've never left behind.

Adam Carolla

Then there's the in-between, not a lipstick lesbian, not a butch dyke. I think that is what I'd be, a sweatpants lesbian.

Adam Carolla

Chicks named Tammy have a greater chance of actually driving a Mercedes than a chick named Mercedes.

Adam Carolla

He doesn't sound like a guy who's done a onesome, let alone a threesome.

Adam Carolla

Should women be on any pills besides birth control? We should just give them all sugar pills for everything, they're so suggestible.

Adam Carolla

I saw a commercial for the maxi pads for the bigger gals they're making now. That was a nice visual while I was eating.

Adam Carolla

I had two thoughts about it. One was I could do that, and the next one was I'll never get to do that.

Libby Doggett

Pre-K is gradually being integrated into the K-12 education system nationwide. In a state that has so many great universities like Purdue, Indiana and Notre Dame, it's a shame (Indiana) won't do more to ensure its own children are better prepared to enter those schools with high quality pre-K.

Ogden Nash

Children aren't happy with nothing to ignore, and that's what parents were created for.

Charles Dyer

We feel very strongly about all children having an equal opportunity for education,

Lesleigh Drye

We got our favorite cookie and our favorite chocolate and our favorite nut mix. And then we got suckers to make our children happy.

Mona Simpson

We go to college, live together or marry, and have kids - often with little more thought to the daily routines of raising children than our grandparents gave them, when women by and large stayed at home.

Mark Finkelstein

We're very excited about this. This is a great thing for the children.

Nina Holland

Very young children can just not protect themselves as effectively as adults can.

Orson Scott Card

It's easy to manipulate your children when they're absolutely sure you're stupid.

Christine Mazier

You do your children a disservice if you don't find time for yourself. If you're always making sacrifices for them, they won't learn to respect your time as they grow.

Allen Ginsberg

This is the same notion - Catholic exorcism, psychotherapy, shamanistic practices - getting to the moment when whatever it was gained access. And also to the name of the spirit. Just to know that it's the Ugly Spirit. That's a great step. Because the spirit doesn't want its name to be known.

T. S. Eliot

The naming of cats is a difficult matter

T. S. Eliot

Before a Cat will condescend To treat you as a trusted friend, Some little token of esteem Is needed, like a dish of cream; And you might now and then supply Some caviare, or Strassburg Pie, Some potted grouse, or salmon paste — He's sure to have his personal taste. (I know a Cat, who makes a habit Of eating nothing else but rabbit, And when he's finished, licks his paws So's not to waste the onion sauce.) A Cat's entitled to expect These evidences of respect. And so in time you reach your aim, And finally call him by his name.

T. S. Eliot

With cats, some say, one rule is true: Don't speak till you are spoken to.

T. S. Eliot

You have learned enough to see that cats are much like you and me.

T. S. Eliot

When a Cat adopts you there is nothing to be done about it except to put up with it until the wind changes.

Scott Westerfeld

Wow," came a familiar voice, "Hypochondriac killed the cat." -Dess

Scott Adams

There's kind of a toll you have to pay with a cat; if you don't pet her for 10 minutes she'll bother you for six hours.

Ray Davies

Put all the pervs in jail, bring back the birch and cat-o-nine tails.