Famous Quotes & Sayings

Ryan Dunn

Bam:Let's see if we can rock and knock this thing over. Ryan:Yeah, thats how I wanted to spend my afternoon... dead.

Kym Whitley

I've always wanted to work with children, to help people, and to be funny.

Neil Innes

So we used to look for funny songs, and learn them and play them. And we used to play them in pubs.

Ali Farahnakian

Teaching someone to be funny is like teaching someone to be fast. They're already fast. You're just making them faster.

Chris Austin

Sometimes students find it funny when it happens to someone else.

Maisie Williams

Sometimes people think they know you and they go, 'Hey!' and then they realize that they've just seen you on the television. That's kind of funny sometimes.

Jenny Lewis

Sometimes people come to my shows and think I'm a Christian artist, and they put their hands up in the air, like they do. But first of all, I'm a Jewish girl from the Valley, and I'm from Los Angeles. It's funny to be misinterpreted.

Allison Jones

Pretty people don't keep comedies on the air. Funny people keep comedies on the air.

Chris Parnell

'Saturday Night Live' is a very particular beast. What it celebrates are individuals who can stand out. I did good work there, but going onstage and saying, 'Hey! Hey! Look at me! Aren't I funny?' - that just wasn't my instinct.

Rain Bojangles

You're just as witty as you feel, just as witty as you feel inside.

Ayn Rand

The worst guilt is to accept an unearned guilt.

Ayn Rand

You can avoid reality, but you cannot avoid the consequences of avoiding reality.

Al Capone

Vote early and vote often.

Baltasar Gracian

Many get the repute of being witty but thereby lose the credit of being sensible. Jest has its little hour, seriousness should have all the rest.

Dylan Moran

The characters can't be wittier than people are in real life. They have to be character witty

e. e. cummings

I'm living so far beyond my income that we may almost be said to be living apart.

Dustin Hoffman

The two basic items necessary to sustain life are sunshine and coconut milk.

Abraham Lincoln

Tell the truth and you won't have so much to remember

Arthur Conan Doyle

Detection is, or ought to be, an exact science, and should be treated in the same cold and unemotional manner. You have attempted to tinge it with romanticism, which produces much the same effect as if you worked a love-story or an elopement into the fifth proposition of Euclid.

Arthur Conan Doyle

I feel that there is reason lurking in you somewhere, so we will patiently grope round for it.

Arthur Conan Doyle

We had got as far as this, when who should walk in but the gentleman himself, who had been drinking his beer in the taproom and had heard the whole conversation. Who was I? What did I want? What did I mean by asking questions? He had a fine flow of language, and his adjectives were very vigorous.

Bob Costas

Any good broadcast, not just an Olympic broadcast, should have texture to it. It should have information, should have some history, should have something that's offbeat, quirky, humorous, and where called for it, should have journalism, and judiciously it should also have commentary. That's my ideal.

Dennis Ritchie

The notion of a record is an obsolete remnant of the days of the 80-column card.

Edsger Dijkstra

PL/1, the fatal disease, belongs more to the problem set than to the solution set.

Chuck Norris

Men are like steel. When they lose their temper, they lose their worth.

Ann Beattie

While I would agree that I write about serious subjects, and that they're not necessarily the most pleasant subjects or even the most pleasant people, as a writer I just think about the humorous aspects of these things - that's what keeps me going when I'm writing a story.

Robert Benchley

If you think that you have caught a cold, call in a good doctor. Call in three good doctors and play bridge.