Famous Quotes & Sayings

Anthony Jeselnik

When I finished high school, I wanted to take all my graduation money and buy myself a motorcycle. But my mom said no. See, she had a brother who died in a horrible motorcycle accident when he was 18. And I could just have his motorcycle.

Ann Brashares

There are two kinds of people in this world. The kind who divide the world into two kinds of people and those who don't.

Ann Brashares

When your about to criticize someone walk a mile in thier shoes, that way when you criticize them you're a mile away from them and you have their shoes

Andy Borowitz

The only way to explain how some people dress for the airport is they think no one else will be there.

Andy Borowitz

Twitter is currently valued at $8 billion, or $1 for every hour it has wasted.

Andy Borowitz

Give a man a fish, and he will eat for a day. Give a man Twitter, and he will forget to eat and starve to death.

Andy Borowitz

Cars will soon have the Internet on the dashboard. I worry that this will distract me from my texting.

Andy Borowitz

Thanks to the Internet, people we might have only suspected of being idiots can now give us ample evidence.

Andy Borowitz

I've invented Twofacebook, the antisocial network. You start being friends w/entire world & defriend people one by one.

Warren Zevon

So I guess I had, I think they tell me I had, about three years total of piano lessons, off and on.

John Wilhelm

We've become persuaded that, after two years of trying to reform the national AFL-CIO, it is unwilling to change,

Barack Obama

I will stand with the Muslims should the political winds shift in an ugly direction.

Douglas Conant

Learning to celebrate success is a key component of learning how to win in the market.

Dontrelle Willis

Whatever I can do to win, I'll do it, even if I have to get hit by a pitch, whatever it takes.

Ami Ayalon

Once we agree on the future, the present will be much easier. A captain who does not know where he wants to sail, there is no wind on Earth that will bring him there. We have first to decide where we want to go, where we want to sail.

Matt Mullenweg

I drive a Prius and drink $10k bottles of wine. The wine isnt on Instagram. The Prius is.

Mark Martin

I've turned over a new leaf. On TV, Kenny Wallace said I was a pessimist after Charlotte, so I got mad. Now I am so excited about coming back that I just can't stand it. I wish we were starting tomorrow and I'm going to win! That's the new me.

Mark Brunell

If we don't win this one, we're done.

Satchel Paige

Sometimes you win, sometimes you lose, sometimes you get rained out.

Mark Gorman

Marriage isn't about winning. It's about lasting.