Famous Quotes & Sayings

Rebecca West

Getting a divorce is nearly always as cheerful and useful an occupation as breaking valuable china.

Woody Allen

In my house I'm the boss, my wife is just the decision maker.

Walter Bagehot

Women--one half the human race at least--care fifty times more for a marriage than a ministry.

Robert Louis Stevenson

Marriage is one long conversation, chequered by disputes.

Robert Louis Stevenson

You can forgive people who do not follow you through a philosophical disquisition; but to find your wife laughing when you had tears in your eyes, or staring when you were in a fit of laughter, would go some way towards a dissolution of the marriage.

Sarah Fielding

There is yet another kind of matrimonial dialect (which naturally succeeds this of talking at each other), which may very properlybe styled The Language Contradictory.... In the former, however plain the object of satire may be exhibited to the whole company, yet there always remains some little covering.... But in this last method, the defiance becomes more open and the impetuosity with which these contradictions are uttered (although the subjects of them are often of the most indifferent nature) evidently prove that they arise from passion.

Sarah Fielding

I believe no gentleman would like to have his family affairs neglected because his wife was filling her head with crotchets and pothooks, and who, because she understood a few scraps of Latin, valued that more than minding her needle or providing her husband's dinner.

Samuel Johnson

It is so far from being natural for a man and woman to live in a state of marriage, that we find all the motives which they have for remaining in that connection, and the restraints which civilised society imposes to prevent separation, are hardly sufficient to keep them together.

Samuel Johnson

I would advise no man to marry who is not likely to propagate understanding.

Carl Jung

Aw, now look at that, you're being sarcastic, aren't you?

Russell Lynes

Don't let you mind wander - it's far too small to be let out on its own.

Russell Lynes

I don't know what makes you so dumb but it really works.

Sarah Silverman

It's funny how people will think I'm being sarcastic a lot and joking. So I'll say, "I like your dress," and they'll go "(bleep) you!" Or I say something serious and they go, "Oh, yeah, ha-ha." They're strangers. They're people who know me from comedy, but luckily I am on pretty much all the time!

William F. Buckley, Jr.

I catch fire and find the reserves of courage and assertiveness to speak up. When that happens I get quite carried away. My blood gets hot my brow wet I become unbearably and unconscionably sarcastic and bellicose I am girded for a total showdown.

Robert Redford

He has the attention span of a lightning bolt.

Vladimir Lenin

It is true that liberty is precious; so precious that it must be carefully rationed.

Wernher von Braun

We can lick gravity, but sometimes the paperwork is overwhelming.

Samuel Butler

He was born stupid, and greatly increased his birthright.

Umberto Eco

A transposable aphorism is a malaise of the urge to be witty, or in other words, a maxim that is untroubled by the fact that the opposite of what it says is equally true so long as it appears to be funny.

Truman Capote

The good thing about masturbation is that you don't have to get dressed up for it.

Woody Allen

Curiosity, that's what kills us. Not muggers or all that bullshit about the ozone layer. It's our own hearts and minds.

Woody Allen

I have no idea what I am doing but incompetence has never prevented me from plunging in with enthusiasm.

Woody Allen

Your self-esteem is a notch below Kafka.

Robyn Carr

Count on Jill Shalvis for a witty, steamy, unputdownable love story.

Virginia Woolf

Old Madame du Deffand and her friends talked for fifty years without stopping. And of it all, what remains? Perhaps three witty sayings. So that we are at liberty to suppose either that nothing was said, or that nothing witty was said, or that the fraction of three witty sayings lasted eighteen thousand two hundred and fifty nights, which does not leave a liberal allowance of wit for any one of them.

Samuel Goldwyn

They stayed away in droves.

Samuel Goldwyn

Keep a stiff upper chin.