Famous Quotes & Sayings

Mark Doren

Nothing in man is more serious than his sense of humor; it is the sign that he wants all the truth.

David Sedaris

Everyone looks retarded once you set your mind to it.

Dave Barry

England manufactures most of the world's airline food, as well as all the food you ever ate in your junior-high-school cafeteria.

Dave Barry

English history consists largely of royal people getting their heads chopped off...Needless to say, this brand of history was a hit with our son.

Dave Barry

The basic Roman ruin design is a pile of rocks with a little plaque saying "Roman Ruins" and a group of tourists frowning at it and wishing they were back at the hotel bar..

Dave Barry

The Romans spent the next 200 years using their great engineering skill to construct ruins all over Europe.

Dave Barry

One key lesson of history is that virtually anything, including afternoon or evening thundershowers, causes Germany to invade Belgium.

Dave Barry

Nevada has a very dynamic economy, with gambling being the number-one industry, followed closely by blood donorship.

Dave Barry

Europeans, like some Americans, drive on the right side of the road, except in England, where they drive on both sides of the road; Italy, where they drive on the sidewalk; and France, where if necessary they will follow you right into the hotel lobby.

Arnold Schoenberg

My music is not modern, it is merely badly played

Martin Bouygues

My successor may need to be more modern than I am. It's a question of generations.

B. R. Ambedkar

The sovereignty of scriptures of all religions must come to an end if we want to have a united integrated modern India.

Dean Miller

I don't think people want chains. People want modern conveniences, but they don't want chains.

Jory Hancock

He is kind of a missionary of modern dance.

Barry Commoner

The modern technologist is less 'sorcerer' and more 'sorcerer's apprentice'.

Camille Paglia

How many modern transsexuals are unacknowledged shamans? Perhaps it is to poets they should go for counsel, rather than surgeons.

Aubrey McClendon

Modern life would not be possible if it were not for chemicals, nor would modern natural gas production.

Dan Stevens

I would like to do something modern and possibly funny.