Famous Quotes & Sayings

Bill Burr

I think it's a privilege to be able to fly to somewhere where people want to see my show.

Bill Burr

I was scared to death because for the comics of my generation, HBO specials are like the pinnacle. I'm thinking of all these unbelievable comedians I've seen on HBO: Chris Rock, George Carlin, Damon Wayans, Richard Pryor and Billy Crystal. I started having a panic attack seeing my name in that list of people. It was pretty overwhelming.

Bill Burr

I think it gets uncomfortable when you try to act like you didn't just tell a joke that bombed.

Bill Burr

For aspiring comedians? Don't listen to me. Just go on stage and do what you think is funny.

Bill Burr

I used to think you had to live this miserable life and that that would make you funnier, but you don't. The misery will come. The misery will find you.

Bill Burr

I keep doing specials because I think there are a lot of people who make movies and TV who are fans of comedy - if they start to like you, they'll get a project going and call you in.

Bill Burr

It's a great time to be a comedian because you've got so much more control. You can say what you want to. I think in the old days with the studio system the performer was a bit of an afterthought. You can be a wildcard on the internet. But if you put something on the internet once it's out there it's out there for life.

Bill Hicks

When you're...stepping over a guy on the sidewalk...does it ever occur to you to think, 'Wow. Maybe our system doesn't work?'

Bill Hicks

And on the seventh day, god stepped back and said and said, "This is my creation, perfect in every way... oh, dammit I left all this pot all over the place. Now they'll think I want them to smoke it... Now I have to create Republicans."

Arsenio Hall

I've never understood what the upside of marriage would be for me personally.

Bertrand Russell

Some `advanced thinkers' are of the opinion that anyone who differs from the conventional opinion must be in the right. This is a delusion; if it were not, truth would be easier to come by than it is.

Antoine de Saint-Exupery

If I were to command a general to turn into a seagull, and if the general did not obey, that would not be the general's fault. It would be mine.

Becca Fitzpatrick

Before I forget, here's your homework. Where do you want me to put it?" She pointed at the trash can. "Right there would be fine.

Dave Barry

What was life like in the colonies? Probably the best word to describe it would be "colonial".

Alan Thicke

So we had psychiatrists and counselors and therapists around the set regularly, especially for those scenes in which Jason would be dealing with a patient to make sure we were doing it all appropriately.

Charlotte Bronte

flattery would be worse than vain; there is no consolation in flattery.

Alanis Morissette

That I would be loved even when I numb myself. That I would be good even when I am overwhelmed. That I would be loved even when I was fuming. That I would be good even if I was clingy.

Chloe Sevigny

I always feel I could be like Toni Collette, going between big studio things and indie films. That would be feasible.

C. S. Lewis

It has actually become very necessary in our time to rebut the theory that every firm and serious friendship is really homosexual.

Berkeley Breathed

If nothing is serious anymore, then there's nothing to satirize.

Alex Rodriguez

We're taking this (stretch run) as seriously as the playoffs.

William Shakespeare

There is nothing serious in Mortality

John Edward

I'm seriously considering it, but I haven't made my decision.

Scott Smith

We had discussions, but nothing serious enough to warrant any offers.

Mitt Romney

I read serious books, but every now and then, I read just for fun.

Christine Lavin

I was a very, very serious child, ... I was valedictorian of my kindergarten and eighth-grade class.

Steve MacFarlane

If all sides are serious about getting this done before the deadline, I think it can be done.