Famous Quotes & Sayings

Bill Burr

I think it's a privilege to be able to fly to somewhere where people want to see my show.

Bill Burr

I was scared to death because for the comics of my generation, HBO specials are like the pinnacle. I'm thinking of all these unbelievable comedians I've seen on HBO: Chris Rock, George Carlin, Damon Wayans, Richard Pryor and Billy Crystal. I started having a panic attack seeing my name in that list of people. It was pretty overwhelming.

Bill Burr

I think it gets uncomfortable when you try to act like you didn't just tell a joke that bombed.

Bill Burr

For aspiring comedians? Don't listen to me. Just go on stage and do what you think is funny.

Bill Burr

I used to think you had to live this miserable life and that that would make you funnier, but you don't. The misery will come. The misery will find you.

Bill Burr

I keep doing specials because I think there are a lot of people who make movies and TV who are fans of comedy - if they start to like you, they'll get a project going and call you in.

Bill Burr

It's a great time to be a comedian because you've got so much more control. You can say what you want to. I think in the old days with the studio system the performer was a bit of an afterthought. You can be a wildcard on the internet. But if you put something on the internet once it's out there it's out there for life.

Bill Hicks

When you're...stepping over a guy on the sidewalk...does it ever occur to you to think, 'Wow. Maybe our system doesn't work?'

Bill Hicks

And on the seventh day, god stepped back and said and said, "This is my creation, perfect in every way... oh, dammit I left all this pot all over the place. Now they'll think I want them to smoke it... Now I have to create Republicans."

Gallagher

I need wrong to get laughs. I need a normal world so that I can be abnormal, and that's my problem. Comedians need prejudice.

Don Rickles

The young comedians always ask me, 'What's the secret for staying around?' I tell them, 'There is no secret - just stay around. Longevity is the most important thing.'

David Steinberg

Comedians talk to other comedians the way jazz musicians can talk to each other.

Frank Caliendo

I think sometimes comedians and entertainers and artists, sometimes they get onstage, and it's all for what they want to do. I think you still need to do stuff for the audience. They're the ones who are making it possible.

Carl Reiner

Comedians are really writers who don't have pens and pencils about them, but they riff.

Bill Burr

I'm a standup comedian who gets to act. I'm never going to not do standup. I love doing it and when I go through periods where I'm doing a lot of acting work, I still do standup.

Bill Burr

Comedians have the ability to feel other emotions.

Chris Pratt

Who knew Rob Lowe was funny? On 'Parks and Rec,' we've got some of the funniest comedy writers, some of the funniest comedians in the world working there. And if anything, we don't just effuse to one another and be like, 'Oh, Rob Lowe's really funny,' if he wasn't.

Rory Bremner

Most Scots might be able to identify six vegetables - but only two MSPs. There are parts of Scotland where you rarely get more than 40% turnout at the polls. There's a big disconnect there, and I think comedians bridge that gap.

Edward G. Bulwer-Lytton

What mankind wants is not talent; it is purpose.

Don Rickles

I'm not one of those guys who wants to die on a stage.

C. S. Lewis

We do not want to merely “see” beauty. We want to be united with it, to receive it into ourselves, to become part of it.

Cecelia Ahern

I can only assume that there’s only one thing more frustrating than not being able to find someone, and that’s not being found. I would want someone to find me, more than anything.

Carrie Brownstein

If you always want to look relevant, just be CGI-prepared.

Carrie Fisher

And when you're young you want to fit in. Hell, I still want to fit in with certain humans, but as you get older you get a little more discriminating.

Carrie Fisher

I don't want to be a victim.

Carrie Fisher

Nobody wants to read about a good-looking happy person.

Bill Bryson

Life just wants to be; but it doesn't want to be much.