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funny beautiful baby
Babies are like poems. They're beautiful to their creator, but to other people, they're silly and they're irritating. Doug Stanhope
funny clueless humor
At least black people knew when they were slaves; you remain clueless. Doug Stanhope
funny believe humor
If you really believe death leads to eternal bliss then why are you wearing a seatbelt? Doug Stanhope
funny running sex
Sex is a very narrow avenue. You only have so many holes and parts, and eventually, you run out of things to do. Doug Stanhope
funny family food
Humans are not proud of their ancestors, and rarely invite them round to dinner. Douglas Adams
funny sports football
Football is not a contact sport. Its a collision sport Duffy Daugherty
funny humor minutes
Yes, about ten minutes. Duke of Wellington
funny mothers-day mom
A mother is not a person to lean on, but a person to make leaning unnecessary. Dorothy Canfield Fisher
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Be precise. A lack of precision is dangerous when the margin of error is small. Donald Rumsfeld
humorists
Great humorists are great insulters. Dick Cavett
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The most exciting happiness is the happiness generated by forces beyond your control. Ogden Nash
american-athlete thomas
Ray Leonard was more of a favorite than Thomas Hearns that night. Thomas Hearns
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President Obama has created the image of an America under President Bush that routinely violated international law. Ben Shapiro
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Easing rates will not improve the situation but increasing liquidity will, ... The central bank needs to get money into the system. I think the economy has problems but it's not going into a depression. It's corporate America that's doing everything to undermine investor confidence. Corporate malfeasance is horrendous. Jon Burnham
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Be proud. Don't put yourself down, because others will follow your lead. I think that the biggest reason America is losing a lot of small swine producers is because most would rather be in some other agriculture-related field making more money. I also think that most large operation hog producers are proud of what they do. John Kramer
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Billy said last week he didn't think there was a place in America that had a better commitment to basketball. Obviously we're a football school, but you'd be hard-pressed to say we're not a basketball school right now. Jeremy Foley
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Bill Nelson has demonstrated that he is a rubber stamp for the Obama administration and he's out of touch with the solution that we need to implement in order to get America back on the right track. Adam Hasner
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Bill is an innovative, cost-focused technology leader. He's proven that he can leverage technology to effectively balance cost control within demanding, high-profile customer service organizations. His talents will be essential as we build Virgin America with our customers in mind each step the way. Fred Reid
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Big energy lobbyists may be cheering the bill's enactment, but ordinary Americans had better hold fast to their wallets. As gasoline prices careen out of control, the bill keeps America speeding down the wrong road toward more oil consumption, more drilling, and more pollution. Anna Aurilio