Famous Quotes & Sayings

David Pierce

Kelsey Grammer is wickedly funny. He's like an 8-year-old child. He's always doing pranks, and we have a great time.

Rob McKittrick

He is that guy in the movie. He is that funny guy who can get in your grill, and be funny about it. He's a lot more interesting in person than you usually see on the screen.

Trevor Noah

Most of my show is true; like, 90% of everything I say on stage is true. I just have to find the way to make it funny - that's the difficult thing.

Taylor Hawkins

Life is funny. If you don't laugh, you're in trouble.

Shaquille O'Neal

Every time I do something silly, it comes off really funny because it's natural.

Maddie Ziegler

I think it's funny when people, they try to imitate the 'Chandelier' video. I think it's hilarious.

Seth Rogen

I think when you do comedy, you play by a different set of rules. No one really wants you to be in that good shape. Being in good shape implies a level of vanity that isn't necessarily funny.

Clara Mamet

I was a good student until I turned 15. Then, all of a sudden, it didn't matter to me anymore. Isn't that funny. I don't want to go to college. I always knew that. But it's hard. My friends are going, and I feel a little left behind.

Joe Lo Truglio

The people from 'The State' are close friends, but also some of the most incredibly funny people I know.

Rebecca West

Getting a divorce is nearly always as cheerful and useful an occupation as breaking valuable china.

Woody Allen

Marriage? That's for life! It's like cement!

Woody Allen

In my house I'm the boss, my wife is just the decision maker.

Will Ferrell

Before you marry a person, you should first make them use a computer with slow Internet to see who they really are.

Richard Pryor

I believe in the institution of marriage, and I intend to keep trying till I get it right.

Robert E. Lee

Marry...into a family that will enable your children to feel proud of both sides of the house.

Robert Lowell

Life begins to happen. My hoppped up husband drops his home disputes, and hits the streets to cruise for prostitutes

Samuel Taylor Coleridge

Show me one couple unhappy merely on account of their limited circumstances, and I will show you ten who are wretched from other causes.

Samuel Johnson

By taking a second wife he pays the highest compliment to the first, by showing that she made him so happy as a married man, that he wishes to be so a second time.

Sean O'Casey

Laughter is wine for the soul-laughter soft, or loud and deep, tinged through with seriousness. the hilarious declaration made by man that life is worth living.

Robert Conquest

The behavior of any bureaucratic organization can best be understood by assuming that it is controlled by a secret cabal of its enemies.

Russell Crowe

This is possibly the most shameful situation I've ever gotten myself in in my life, and I've done some pretty dumb things in my life. So to actually make a new No. 1 is spectacularly stupid.

Sarah Palin

All of 'em, any of 'em that have been in front of me over all these years.

Wendy Liebman

My husband wanted one of those big-screen TVs for his birthday. So I just moved his chair closer to the one we have already.

Willard Scott

Bryant Gumbel's ego has applied for statehood. And if it's accepted, it will be the fifth-largest.

Kellie Pickler

I thought Europe was a country?

Siouxsie Sioux

You can't take anything like that seriously. I mean, sex is pretty hilarious anyway.

Emo Philips

I asked God for a bike, but I know God doesn't work that way. So I stole a bike and asked for forgiveness.