Famous Quotes & Sayings

Mark Doren

Nothing in man is more serious than his sense of humor; it is the sign that he wants all the truth.

David Sedaris

Everyone looks retarded once you set your mind to it.

Dave Barry

England manufactures most of the world's airline food, as well as all the food you ever ate in your junior-high-school cafeteria.

Dave Barry

English history consists largely of royal people getting their heads chopped off...Needless to say, this brand of history was a hit with our son.

Dave Barry

The basic Roman ruin design is a pile of rocks with a little plaque saying "Roman Ruins" and a group of tourists frowning at it and wishing they were back at the hotel bar..

Dave Barry

The Romans spent the next 200 years using their great engineering skill to construct ruins all over Europe.

Dave Barry

One key lesson of history is that virtually anything, including afternoon or evening thundershowers, causes Germany to invade Belgium.

Dave Barry

Nevada has a very dynamic economy, with gambling being the number-one industry, followed closely by blood donorship.

Dave Barry

Europeans, like some Americans, drive on the right side of the road, except in England, where they drive on both sides of the road; Italy, where they drive on the sidewalk; and France, where if necessary they will follow you right into the hotel lobby.

Benjamin Rush

Beer is a wholesome liquor.....it abounds with nourishment

Bill Burr

Ric Flair is the greatest guy ever. He just wants to hang out, have a beer, and tell stories. He's the coolest. I've never met The [Chris] Rock though.

Nadim Khoury

We can sell non-alcoholic beer in Gaza very easily.

John Limberopoulos

We have beer and wine, but no liquor.

Suzanne Williamson

You'll be paying 75 cents a beer instead of $3.

Grant Woods

You can do anything with beer that you can do with wine, ... Beer is great for basting or marinating meat and fish.

Pat Malone

It didn't take much to move the Dukes. Beer sales was probably the biggest reason. Baseball, hot dogs and beer go together.

Zakk Wylde

I'm just worried that there's enough beer on the bus. That's the top priority at all times.

Sean Salisbury

The quarterback position is like a soap opera. You and I could have watched a certain soap opera in 1990, and you and I could be watching it over a beer in 2005, and it will be the same qualities, the same story, the same everything, except that the hairstyles have changed.

Brandon Flowers

I'm not sure how young kids get to the point where they're memorizing and knowing songs, but I knew the words to 'Missing You' from John Waite probably from when I was three years old. For whatever reason, that was the song that I gravitated toward when it was on the radio and I was driving around with my mom.

Wole Soyinka

Those nations that say it's a crime to preach your religion are making a terrible mistake. All they're doing is driving underground other forms of spiritual intuitions and practices.

Steve Burtt

That was the driving force. That was in all of our heads and we wanted to prove a point and end that curse.

Gary Horrell

That was a great learning experience for him. It's kind of been driving him.

John Hargreaves

We can't have a police officer on every single street making sure that people are driving to conditions,

George E. Brown

You and I are paying for these thefts. If the public thinks the market is driving up home prices, they're only partially right. It's also theft from construction sites.

Kevin Osnes

We're still trying to figure out how to stop him from driving to the basket.

Megan Fox

In New York, especially, so much of your life is spent on the streets. You don't always want to be driving around in an SUV with a security guard. You want to be able to walk to a restaurant; you want to go and do things.

Brett Favre

I would love to go in. I thought about getting to Tennessee tonight and driving in with some supplies.