Famous Quotes & Sayings

Jarome Iginla

That one wasn't so funny because he got hurt.

Benjamin Disraeli

When men are pure, laws are useless; when men are corrupt, laws are broken.

Demetri Martin

I was in my friends garage, and he had; a kite, a yo-yo, and a boomerang. I was like "Dude, you have abandonment issues"

Damon Runyon

The race is not always to the swift, nor the battle to the strong, but that's the way to bet.

Thomas Fuller

The patient is not likely to recover who makes the doctor his heir.

Bill Cosby

A new father quickly learns that his child invariably comes to the bathroom at precisely the times when he's in there, as if he needed company. The only way for this father to be certain of bathroom privacy is to shave at the gas station.

Duncan Kennedy

We see a lot of these submissions being funny. We hope people are going to share these laughs together and why wouldn't you want to have a joke in your pocket?

Mike Birbiglia

You get to the end of something, you're laughing, you're like, 'That's funny, and that's funny,' and then you get to the end, and the credits come down, and you're like, 'That's it?! That's the whole thing?! You had me here for that?!' I just don't want to do that.

Will Rogers

Everything is funny as long as it is happening to someone else

Michael Davis

The money has just been piling up and isn't being allocated.

Howard Rogers

The money can then be used only for road resurfacing,

Ross Perot

Once you pay the bills, money is the most overrated thing in the world

Joan Laporta

Samuel is not for sale, not even for all the money in the world.

Jack Ablin

You needed to be a meteorologist to make money in this market.

Burt Reynolds

Money doesn't buy happiness. It buys great hookers - but not happiness.

Justin Flom

Don't spend money on extravagant things like cars and big vacations. Spend it on things that are really fun.

Daawna Moeller

We're going to walk and raise money for research.

Sydney J. Harris

Men make counterfeit money; in many more cases, money makes counterfeit men.

Daniel Johns

So I went and visited a doctor and he diagnosed me with reactive arthritis.

Sinead O'Connor

I was getting a lot of pressure from people in show business about my being overweight because of medication, I was on 200 mg of amitriptiline. When I said this to my doctor, for some reason she took me completely off medication and she didn't really supervise properly.

Mariel Hemingway

There's no doctor in a white coat that's going to save you, or a system or a pill - it's always going to be you and the choices that you make.

Sherry Stringfield

I'm a terrible patient, and I find that doctors can be very condescending.

Barry Bostwick

People have a tendency to cast me more as lawyers and doctors and just rich guys, rich assholes basically, a lot of rich assholes. That's what I'm normally seen as, you know.

Benjamin Franklin

A lady asked Dr. Franklin Well Doctor what have we got a republic or a monarchy - "A republic," replied the Doctor, "if you can keep it."