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The states have a total of $80 billion in deficit spending. What are they going to have to do? Well, they are either going to have to cut programs, which will drag the economy down, or they are going to have to raise taxes, which will drag the economy down. Charles Schumer
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The whole town laughed at my great-grandfather, just because he worked hard and saved his money. True, working at the hardware store didn't pay much, but he felt it was better than what everybody else did, which was go up to the volcano and collect the gold nuggets it shot out every day. It turned out he was right. After forty years, the volcano petered out. Everybody left town, and the hardware store went broke. Finally he decided to collect gold nuggets too, but there weren't many left by then. Plus, he broke his leg and the doctor's bills were real high. ![]()
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Germany, Japan and, to a lesser extent, Britain and Italy, were lifted out of the debris of war by the Americans who poured in billions of dollars and forgave other billions in debts. Gordon Sinclair
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When you pay a hospital bill, you're really paying two hospital bills - one bill for you because you have a job and/or insurance and can pay the hospital. and another bill, which is tacked onto your bill, to cover the medical expenses of someone who doesn't have a job and/or insurance and can't pay the hospital. P. J. O'Rourke
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The transportation and the energy bill would have been a good place to go back and revisit for some of the spending that occurred there. Lindsey Graham
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Let me be clear -- the Congress will be writing the next farm bill in 2007 and I am deeply concerned the (Bush) administration is using the current negotiations to reshape farm policy without the full input of Congress and grassroots support, Saxby Chambliss
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One thing Billy taught me is to know how to handle the situation. I learned how to handle the situation, ... It's hard to know how to handle it. Octavio Dotel
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Is Bill Clinton serving as a lobbyist and public-relations guru to the government of Dubai? It sure looks like it. Dick Morris
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Bill, don’t look at me — I’m ’ideous. J. K. Rowling
funny mom brother
When I finished high school, I wanted to take all my graduation money and buy myself a motorcycle. But my mom said no. See, she had a brother who died in a horrible motorcycle accident when he was 18. And I could just have his motorcycle. Anthony Jeselnik
funny humor two
There are two kinds of people in this world. The kind who divide the world into two kinds of people and those who don't. Ann Brashares
funny hilarious humor
When your about to criticize someone walk a mile in thier shoes, that way when you criticize them you're a mile away from them and you have their shoes Ann Brashares
funny travel thinking
The only way to explain how some people dress for the airport is they think no one else will be there. Andy Borowitz
funny technology hours
Twitter is currently valued at $8 billion, or $1 for every hour it has wasted. Andy Borowitz
funny technology men
Give a man a fish, and he will eat for a day. Give a man Twitter, and he will forget to eat and starve to death. Andy Borowitz
funny travel worry
Cars will soon have the Internet on the dashboard. I worry that this will distract me from my texting. Andy Borowitz
funny technology giving
Thanks to the Internet, people we might have only suspected of being idiots can now give us ample evidence. Andy Borowitz
funny technology people
I've invented Twofacebook, the antisocial network. You start being friends w/entire world & defriend people one by one. Andy Borowitz