Deborah Tannen
Deborah Tannen
Deborah Frances Tannenis an American academic and professor of linguistics at Georgetown University in Washington, D.C. She has been McGraw Distinguished Lecturer at Princeton University and was a fellow at the Center for Advanced Study in the Behavioral Sciences following a term in residence at the Institute for Advanced Study in Princeton, NJ...
NationalityAmerican
ProfessionSociologist
Date of Birth7 June 1945
CountryUnited States of America
men decision natural
Many women feel it is natural to consult with their partners at every turn, while many men automatically make more decisions without consulting their partners.
sex communication men
The Pavlovian view of women voters - plug the words in, and they will respond - sends a chill down my spine because it sounds like an adaptation of something I have written about communication between the sexes: When a woman tells a man about a problem, she doesn't want him to fix it; she just wants him to listen and let her know he understands. But there's a difference between a private conversation and a presidential election, between what we want from our leaders.
men issues independence
The desire for freedom and independence becomes more of an issue for many men in relationships, whereas interdependence and connection become more of an issue for many women.
men doors connections
The chivalrous man who holds a door open or signals a woman to go ahead of him when he's driving is negotiating both status and connection.
men public-speaking feels
More men feel comfortable doing "public speaking," while more women feel comfortable doing "private" speaking.
men understanding want
Many men honestly do not know what women want, and women honestly do not know why men find what they want so hard to comprehend and deliver.
mother father men
Like most men, my father is interested in action. And this is why he disappoints my mother when she tells him she doesn't feel well and he offers to take her to the doctor. He is focused on what he can do, whereas she wants sympathy.
morning character men
To say anything about women and men without marking oneself as either feminist or anti-feminist, male-basher or apologist for men seems as impossible for a woman as trying to get dressed in the morning without inviting interpretations of her character. Sitting at the conference table musing on these matters, I felt sad to think that we women didn't have the freedom to be unmarked that the men sitting next to us had. Some days you just want to get dressed and go about your business. But if you're a woman, you can't, because there is no unmarked woman.
frustration men offering
If women are often frustrated because men do not respond to their troubles by offering matching troubles, men are often frustrated because women do.
fighting views argument
Public discourse requires making an argument for a point of view, not having an argument - as in having a fight.
mean people littles
Life is a matter of dealing with other people, in little matters and cataclysmic ones, and that means a series of conversations.
teacher winning ideas
[T]he seeds of [the Argument Culture] can be found our classrooms, where a teacher will introduce an article or an idea . . . setting up debates where people learn not to listen to each other because they're so busy trying to win the debate.
equal-treatment people ifs
Treating people the same is not equal treatment if they are not the same.
girl way obvious
Girls are not accustomed to jockeying for status in an obvious way; they are more concerned that they be liked.