John Bradshaw
John Bradshaw
emotional knowing way
Since the earliest period of our life was preverbal, everything depended on emotional interaction. Without someone to reflect our emotions, we had no way of knowing who we were.
children believe past
I believe that this neglected, wounded, inner child of the past is the major source of human misery.
artist mark here-and-now
It is a mark of soulfulness to be present in the here and now. When we are present, we are not fabricating inner movies. We are seeing what is before us.
powerful feelings way
Condemning others as bad or sinful is a way to feel righteous. Such a feeling is a powerful mood alteration and can become highly addictive.
dark order evil
Evil is a source of moral intelligence in the sense that we need to learn from our shadow, from our dark side, in order to be good.
attitude believe feelings
Our beliefs create the kind of world we believe in. We project our feelings, thoughts and attitudes onto the world. I can create a different world by changing my belief about the world. Our inner state creates the outer and not vice versa.
growing-up self-esteem mean
Growing up means leaving home and becoming a self supporting adult. I think this the hardest task any human being hast to face.
children self discipline
Children need parents who model self-discipline rather than preach it. They learn from what their parents are actually willing to do; not from what they say they do.
self-esteem years three
The foundation for our self-image is grounded in the first three years of life. It comes from our major caretaker's mirroring.
evil broken shadow
I define a good person as somebody who is fully conscious of their own limitations. They know their strengths, but they also know their shadow - they know their weaknesses. In other words, they understand that there is no good without bad. Good and evil are really one, but we have broken them up in our consciousness. We polarize them.
stars powerful shame
The most paradoxical aspect of neurotic shame is that it is the core motivator of the superachieved and the underachieved, the star and the scapegoat, the righteous and the wretched, the powerful and the pathetic.
feelings storm needs
All these feelings need to be felt. We need to stomp and storm; to sob and cry; to perspire and tremble.
denial sincere delusional
Chronically dysfunctioning families are also delusional. Delusion is sincere denial.
dog animal self
Science has so far been unable to tell us how self-aware dogs are, much less whether they have anything like our conscious thoughts. This is not surprising, since neither scientists nor philosophers can agree about what the consciousness of humans consists of, let alone that of animals.