Mark Twain
Mark Twain
Samuel Langhorne Clemens, better known by his pen name Mark Twain, was an American writer. Among his novels are The Adventures of Tom Sawyerand its sequel, Adventures of Huckleberry Finn, the latter often called "The Great American Novel"...
NationalityAmerican
ProfessionNovelist
Date of Birth30 November 1835
CountryUnited States of America
funny witty inspirational-life
The only way to keep your health is to eat what you don't want, drink what you don't like, and do what you'd rather not.
funny life sarcastic
Never put off till tomorrow what you can do the day after tomorrow.
ignorant body knows
Right is right, and wrong is wrong, and a body ain’t got no business doing wrong when he ain’t ignorant and knows better.
supposing-that guessing goes-on
Some things you can't find out; but you will never know you can't by guessing and supposing: no, you have to be patient and go on experimenting until you find out that you can't find out.
opportunity security career-opportunities
There is no security in life, only opportunity.
funny life death
I didn't attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it.
success your-best-friend
There's always something about your success that displeases even your best friends.
motivational truth lying
I have a higher and grander standard of principle than George Washington. He could not lie; I can, but I won't.
rivers water mexico
Until I came to New Mexico, I never realized how much beauty water adds to a river.
wedding flower sunshine
A marriage...makes of two fractional lives a whole; it gives to two purposeless lives a work, and doubles the strength of each to perform it; it gives to two questioning natures a reason for living, and something to live for; it will give a new gladness to the sunshine, a new fragrance to the flowers, a new beauty to the earth, and a new mystery to life.
sunday america issues
There is no family in America without a clock, and consequently there is no fair pretext for the usual Sunday medley of dreadful sounds that issues from our steeples.
along damage duration electric enjoys fools humor lightning wit
Wit and Humor -- if any difference, it is in duration -- lightning and electric light. Same material, apparently; but one is vivid, and can do damage -- the other fools along and enjoys elaboration.
becomes grounded moment wisdom
Wit, by itself, is of little account. It becomes a moment only when grounded on wisdom.
academy boots born capacity chance greatest happens heaven knew meet military napoleon people shining
Well, we can take you to meet Napoleon -- but he's shining the boots of the person who actually was the world's greatest military genius. He happens to have been a tinsmith from Pennsylvania who never had a chance to go to a military academy -- so he never even knew he was a great military genius. He was born with that capacity -- and only here in heaven do we actually know who these people are.