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funny clueless humor
At least black people knew when they were slaves; you remain clueless. Doug Stanhope
funny believe humor
If you really believe death leads to eternal bliss then why are you wearing a seatbelt? Doug Stanhope
funny running sex
Sex is a very narrow avenue. You only have so many holes and parts, and eventually, you run out of things to do. Doug Stanhope
funny might masters
You might be a cunning linguist, but I am a master debater. Donald Rumsfeld
funny sports football
Sure, luck means a lot in football. Not having a good quarterback is bad luck. Don Shula
funny dog blood
Yes, he's got all them different kinds of thoroughbred blood in him, and he's got other kinds you ain't mentioned and that you ain't slick enough to see. Don Marquis
funny pregnancy humor
It takes all sorts of people to make the underworld. Don Marquis
funny birthday time
Middle age is the time when a man is always thinking that in a week or two he will feel as good as ever. Don Marquis
funny birthday meaningful
Of middle age the best that can be said is that a middle-aged person has likely learned how to have a little fun in spite of his troubles. Don Marquis
anniversary brings himself images man morning satellite somber terrible tv yorkers
On the 11th anniversary of 9/11, it is some consolation that the man most responsible for that terrible morning will not be smiling smugly to himself as satellite TV brings to the leafy boulevards of Abbottabad the somber images of New Yorkers commemorating those who perished in the Twin Towers. Bobby Ghosh
marriage sex couple
Marriage is not something that can be accomplished all at once; it has to be constantly reaccomplished. A couple must never indulge in idle tranquility with the remark: "The game is won; let's relax." The game is never won. The chances of life are such that anything is possible. Remember what the dangers are for both sexes in middle age. A successful marriage is an edifice that must be rebuilt every day. Andre Maurois
marriage
A band is like a marriage - you don't know why it works, but when it does, everything feels right. Nuno Bettencourt
marriage relationship
A band is like a marriage, and if you're in a marriage with someone, and you lose yourself in that marriage, the relationship is over, really. Richie Sambora