Related Quotes
funny people seen
Sometimes people think they know you and they go, 'Hey!' and then they realize that they've just seen you on the television. That's kind of funny sometimes. Maisie Williams
funny
That one wasn't so funny because he got hurt. Jarome Iginla
funny writing winning
He had senile dementia and liked to go outside naked, but he could still do two things perfectly: win at checkers and write out prescriptions. Barbara Kingsolver
funny children gone
The Schnauzer listens to jazz. I listen to jazz because he likes it, and I have even gone to jazz concerts with him, but truthfully I would rather listen to retarded children pounding on pan lids with wooden spoons. Augusten Burroughs
funny girl administration
I'm in a situation with this girl that's as hopeless as overthrowing the Bush administration. Aziz Ansari
funny marriage witty
No man is regular in his attendance at the House of Commons until he is married. Benjamin Disraeli
funny originally referred rooms shakespeare suddenly
It's funny to be in rooms where you were originally referred to as 'The Shakespeare Guy' and to suddenly be in the position where you're 'The Blockbuster Guy.' That's a pretty unusual turnabout, I must say. Kenneth Branagh
funny success men
Every man has a right to be conceited until he is successful.
funny truth communication
When men are pure, laws are useless; when men are corrupt, laws are broken.
witty
You're just as witty as you feel, just as witty as you feel inside. Rain Bojangles
witty guilt accepting
The worst guilt is to accept an unearned guilt. Ayn Rand
witty humorous healing
You can avoid reality, but you cannot avoid the consequences of avoiding reality.
witty humorous voting
Vote early and vote often. Al Capone
witty should-have credit
Many get the repute of being witty but thereby lose the credit of being sensible. Jest has its little hour, seriousness should have all the rest. Baltasar Gracian
witty real character
The characters can't be wittier than people are in real life. They have to be character witty Dylan Moran
witty art money
I'm living so far beyond my income that we may almost be said to be living apart. e. e. cummings
witty sunshine cowboy
The two basic items necessary to sustain life are sunshine and coconut milk. Dustin Hoffman
witty remember telling-the-truth
Tell the truth and you won't have so much to remember Abraham Lincoln
humorous drinking mean
We had got as far as this, when who should walk in but the gentleman himself, who had been drinking his beer in the taproom and had heard the whole conversation. Who was I? What did I want? What did I mean by asking questions? He had a fine flow of language, and his adjectives were very vigorous. Arthur Conan Doyle
humorous should-have quirky
Any good broadcast, not just an Olympic broadcast, should have texture to it. It should have information, should have some history, should have something that's offbeat, quirky, humorous, and where called for it, should have journalism, and judiciously it should also have commentary. That's my ideal. Bob Costas
humorous cards records
The notion of a record is an obsolete remnant of the days of the 80-column card. Dennis Ritchie
humorous disease problem
PL/1, the fatal disease, belongs more to the problem set than to the solution set. Edsger Dijkstra
humorous bad-ass men
Men are like steel. When they lose their temper, they lose their worth. Chuck Norris
humorous majority vote
One, with God, is always a majority, but many a martyr has been burned at the stake while the votes were being counted. Thomas Reed
humorous shut-up pears
No. Now, shut up and eat your pears. Suzanne Collins
humorous america people
America is a nation of 270 million people: 100 million of them are gangsters, another 100 million are hustlers, 50 million are complete lunatics, and every single one of us is secretly in show business. Isn't that fabulous? Tom Robbins
humorous telephones machines
As expected, you get his machine. Someday, even the "call of nature" will be answered by a machine.