Famous Quotes & Sayings

David Pierce

Kelsey Grammer is wickedly funny. He's like an 8-year-old child. He's always doing pranks, and we have a great time.

Rob McKittrick

He is that guy in the movie. He is that funny guy who can get in your grill, and be funny about it. He's a lot more interesting in person than you usually see on the screen.

Trevor Noah

Most of my show is true; like, 90% of everything I say on stage is true. I just have to find the way to make it funny - that's the difficult thing.

Taylor Hawkins

Life is funny. If you don't laugh, you're in trouble.

Shaquille O'Neal

Every time I do something silly, it comes off really funny because it's natural.

Maddie Ziegler

I think it's funny when people, they try to imitate the 'Chandelier' video. I think it's hilarious.

Ginnifer Goodwin

I think it's funny how there are a thousand shows out there, and a thousand movies, that are glorifying (extramarital) affairs, while this man is being completely honest with his wives.

John Pelphrey

I think the NCAA has a funny sense of humor with regards to pairing us up with Florida.

Mike Birbiglia

I think your tendency when you play yourself is to accentuate something about you that you think is the funny thing about you.

Umberto Eco

A transposable aphorism is a malaise of the urge to be witty, or in other words, a maxim that is untroubled by the fact that the opposite of what it says is equally true so long as it appears to be funny.

Truman Capote

The good thing about masturbation is that you don't have to get dressed up for it.

Virginia Woolf

The history of most women is hidden either by silence, or by flourishes and ornaments that amount to silence.

Woody Allen

Curiosity, that's what kills us. Not muggers or all that bullshit about the ozone layer. It's our own hearts and minds.

Woody Allen

What if the worst is true? What if there's no God, and you only go around once, and that's it? Don't you want to be a part of the experience? You know, what the hell? It's not all a drag, and I'm thinking to myself: Geez! I should stop ruining my life searching for answers I'm never gonna get and just enjoy it while it lasts. And, you know, after-who knows? Maybe there is something, nobody really knows. I know that maybe is a very slim reed to hang your whole life on, but that's the best we have.

Woody Allen

I feel that life is divided into the horrible and the miserable. That's the two categories. The horrible are like, I don't know, terminal cases, you know, and blind people, crippled. I don't know how they get through life. It's amazing to me. And the miserable is everyone else. So you should be thankful that you're miserable, because that's very lucky, to be miserable.

Woody Allen

Photons have mass? I didn’t even know they were Catholic.

Woody Allen

I have no idea what I am doing but incompetence has never prevented me from plunging in with enthusiasm.

Woody Allen

I’m going to kill myself. I should go to Paris and jump off the Eiffel Tower. I’ll be dead. you know, in fact, if I get the Concorde, I could be dead three hours earlier, which would be perfect. Or wait a minute. It -- with the time change, I could be alive for six hours in New York but dead three hours in Paris. I could get things done, and I could also be dead.

John Eisenhower

I was a lieutenant in World War II.

Al Spalding

No human mind may measure the blessings conferred by the game of base ball on the soldiers of the Civil War. It had its earliest evolution when soldiers, North and South, were striving to forget their foes by cultivating, through this grand game, fraternal friendships with comrades in arms.

Dito Montiel

I have friends who have had PTSD, and you can get it from other things than war.

Robert E. Lee

Sir, if you ever presume again to speak disrespectfully of General Grant in my presence, either you or I will sever his connection with this university.

Robert Conquest

The Soviet assumption that all other political life-forms and beliefs were inherently and immutably hostile was the simple and central cause of that Cold War.

Rob Zombie

People would always say horror movies always thrive during times of war; that's just what people would say. And I don't know if they thrived during World War II or Vietnam, but I thought that's kind of strange, why would that happen. I don't know if people rearrange their priorities; in good times, they freak out and start pointing the fingers at video games and TV, but when horrible things are happening in the world, it [horror movie] just seems a little ridiculous.

Richard Perle

For us, terrorism remains the great evil of our time, and the war against this evil, our generation’s great cause … There is no middle way for Americans: it is victory or holocaust.

Richard Perle

Even now, the irony that so non-intellectual a man should choose to engage the Soviet Union on the battlefield of ideas has eluded most commentators and historians.

Richard Perle

The lax multiculturalism that urges Americans to accept the unacceptable from their fellow citizens is one of this nation's greatest vulnerabilities in the war on terror.