Paula Poundstone
Paula Poundstone
Paula Poundstoneis an American stand-up comedian, author, actress, interviewer and commentator. Beginning in the late 1980s, she performed a series of one-hour HBO comedy specials. She provided backstage commentary during the 1992 presidential election on The Tonight Show with Jay Leno. She is a frequent panelist on National Public Radio's weekly news quiz show Wait Wait... Don't Tell Me...
NationalityAmerican
ProfessionComedian
Date of Birth29 December 1959
CityHuntsville, AL
CountryUnited States of America
I was diagnosed a number of years ago with obsessive-compulsive disorder - which everyone has, to some degree - and I have this really annoying trait where in conversation, I always steer it back to something that happened to me.
I'm really more prolific than most stand-ups. My act changes. I do fold in new experiences, new observations, whatever you want to call it.
The wages of sin are death, but by the time taxes are taken out, it's just sort of a tired feeling.
The mistakes that I made I made because I drank too much. I don't think that's going to happen any more. Am I going to make mistakes as a parent? Sadly, every day. I'm looking around for the perfect parent and I haven't seen one yet.
Remember when you were considered an environmentalist when you didn't throw junk out the car window? I sure do miss that simpler, happier time.
Adults are always asking little kids what they want to be when they grow up because they're looking for ideas
I don’t believe for a second that weightlifting is a sport. They pick up a heavy thing and put it down again. To me, that’s indecision.
It's funny that we think of libraries as quiet demure places where we are shushed by dusty, bun-balancing, bespectacled women. The truth is libraries are raucous clubhouses for free speech, controversy and community. Librarians have stood up to the Patriot Act, sat down with noisy toddlers and reached out to illiterate adults. Libraries can never be shushed.
The problem with cats is that they get the exact same look on their face whether they see a moth or an axe-murderer.
You know, in politics when you come in third, it's a win.
Can you remember when you didn't want to sleep? Isn't it inconceivable? I guess the definition of adulthood is that you want to sleep.
I was one of the first people to almost actually vomit over hearing the use of the phrase "family values" and I pride myself on never having fallen for the idea that Barbara Bush was sweet and grandmotherly. I met Barbara Bush and, as I expected, she was a tank with eyes, not a nice person at all and why should that blow anybody away?
The definition of adulthood is that you want to sleep.
I'm thankful that my memory is good because my vision is going.