Robert Orben
Robert Orben
Robert Orbenis best known as an American professional comedy writer, though he also worked as a speechwriter for Gerald R. Ford and as a magician. He has written multiple books on comedy, mostly collections of gags and "one-liners" originally written for his newsletter, Orben's Current Comedy, and he has also written books for magicians...
NationalityAmerican
ProfessionEntertainer
Date of Birth4 March 1927
CountryUnited States of America
insecure people quick telling themselves willing younger
Telling a joke is risk taking. Younger people are more insecure and not willing to put themselves on the line, so a quick one-liner is much safer.
calendar playboy top year
The Playboy calendar this year has some tip-top models. Any more top and they'd tip.
humorous native-american profound
Illegal aliens have always been a problem in the United States. Ask any Indian.
sunshine compliment
A compliment is verbal sunshine.
religion what-if earth
What if the meek inherited the Earth and we had to defend ourselves from Martians?
valentine divorce cards
Did you hear about the woman who sent out 40,000 Valentine Cards doused in perfume and signed, "Guess Who?" She's a divorce lawyer.
father kids smell
For Father's Day, my kids always give me a bottle of cologne called English Leather. It's appropriate! To them I always smell like a wallet.
humility grace crow
The true test of humility is whether you can say grace before eating crow.
oil government energy
I feel that if God had really wanted us to have enough oil, he would never have given us a Department of Energy.
lasts economy quarters
Economists can certainly disappoint you. One said that the economy would turn up by the last quarter. Well, I'm down to mine and it hasn't.
funny-life people obsolescence
Planned obsolescence is not really a new concept. God used it with people.
valentines-day girl heart
I got a Valentine's Day card from my girl. It said, 'Take my heart! Take my arms! Take my lips!' Which is just like her. Keeping the best part for herself.
humor fighting two
In prehistoric times, mankind often had only two choices in crisis situations: fight or flee. In modern times, humor offers us a third alternative; fight, flee - or laugh.
expectations pandas disappointing
Summit meetings tend to be like panda matings. The expectations are always high, and the results usually disappointing.