Woody Allen
Woody Allen
Heywood "Woody" Allenis an American actor, comedian, filmmaker, playwright and musician, whose career spans more than six decades...
NationalityAmerican
ProfessionDirector
Date of Birth1 December 1935
CityBronx, NY
CountryUnited States of America
writing math discovery
Standard mathematics has recently been rendered obsolete by the discovery that for years we have been writing the numeral five backward. This has led to reevaluation of counting as a method of getting from one to ten. Students are taught advanced concepts of Boolean algebra, and formerly unsolvable equations are dealt with by threats of reprisals.
doubt
I am plagued by doubts.
funeral grandfather tables
My grandfather had a wonderful funeral... On the buffet table there was a replica of the deceased in potato salad.
drama struggle writing
The comedies are not a million laughs on the set. Its business and the dramas are business as well, really. When I'm writing it I struggle more with drama because I started out in comedy.
gun rifles citizens
Oh, he was probably a member of the National Rifle Association. It was a group that helped criminals get guns so they could shoot citizens. It was a public service.
links masturbation entry
But it was I, yes I, who discovered the link between excessive masturbation and entry into politics!
groups possibility discounts
Where did we come from? Where are we going? Is there possibility of a group discount?
enjoy-it-while-it-lasts answers should
Geez, I should stop ruining my life searching for answers I'm never gonna get, and just enjoy it while it lasts.
writing play ifs
When I'm writing something, if there's a part that's good for me, then I'll play it. Otherwise, I don't. And I notice that there are less and less parts for me in my own writing.
orange forgive-me forgiving
Please forgive me. My pedicurist had a stroke. She fell forward onto the orange stick and plunged it into my toe. It required bandaging.
want fear-of-death happens
I don't fear death. - I just don't want to be around when it happens.
writing people stupidity
My films are misinterpreted all the time. I don't mind that. Everybody's films are misinterpreted. But there's no malice or stupidity in the people that misinterpret them. You know what you do, but someone else sees it, and they want to talk about it or write about it, and so they misinterpret them.
philosophy done soup
The great question of philosophy remains: If life is meaningless, what can be done about alphabet soup?
beauty cutting twenties
Umlaut snaps around and we cut to a blond apparition in her early twenties, clearly descended from Olympus by way of Hugh Hefner's mansion.