Famous Quotes & Sayings

David Pierce

Kelsey Grammer is wickedly funny. He's like an 8-year-old child. He's always doing pranks, and we have a great time.

Rob McKittrick

He is that guy in the movie. He is that funny guy who can get in your grill, and be funny about it. He's a lot more interesting in person than you usually see on the screen.

Trevor Noah

Most of my show is true; like, 90% of everything I say on stage is true. I just have to find the way to make it funny - that's the difficult thing.

Taylor Hawkins

Life is funny. If you don't laugh, you're in trouble.

Shaquille O'Neal

Every time I do something silly, it comes off really funny because it's natural.

Maddie Ziegler

I think it's funny when people, they try to imitate the 'Chandelier' video. I think it's hilarious.

Ginnifer Goodwin

I think it's funny how there are a thousand shows out there, and a thousand movies, that are glorifying (extramarital) affairs, while this man is being completely honest with his wives.

John Pelphrey

I think the NCAA has a funny sense of humor with regards to pairing us up with Florida.

Mike Birbiglia

I think your tendency when you play yourself is to accentuate something about you that you think is the funny thing about you.

Carl Jung

Aw, now look at that, you're being sarcastic, aren't you?

Russell Lynes

Don't let you mind wander - it's far too small to be let out on its own.

Russell Lynes

I don't know what makes you so dumb but it really works.

Woody Allen

I'd call him a sadistic, hippophilic necrophile, but that would be beating a dead horse.

Woody Allen

Throughout history in the theater and film people do like sarcastic characters, and they do like curmudgeons - if they're amusing, they do like them despite the fact that they're vitriolic, particularly if they're for the right thing. If you can see that the person is a decent person and is for the right thing, and is not just a nasty person with base motives, but someone who is a decent human but expresses himself.

Woody Allen

Most of the time I don't have much fun. The rest of the time I don't have any fun at all.

Sarah Rees Brennan

I am in full possession of the amazing power of being sarcastic.

Sarah Silverman

It's funny how people will think I'm being sarcastic a lot and joking. So I'll say, "I like your dress," and they'll go "(bleep) you!" Or I say something serious and they go, "Oh, yeah, ha-ha." They're strangers. They're people who know me from comedy, but luckily I am on pretty much all the time!

Sara Gilbert

I'd to do more stuff with less sarcasm.

Umberto Eco

A transposable aphorism is a malaise of the urge to be witty, or in other words, a maxim that is untroubled by the fact that the opposite of what it says is equally true so long as it appears to be funny.

Truman Capote

The good thing about masturbation is that you don't have to get dressed up for it.

Virginia Woolf

The history of most women is hidden either by silence, or by flourishes and ornaments that amount to silence.

Woody Allen

Curiosity, that's what kills us. Not muggers or all that bullshit about the ozone layer. It's our own hearts and minds.

Woody Allen

What if the worst is true? What if there's no God, and you only go around once, and that's it? Don't you want to be a part of the experience? You know, what the hell? It's not all a drag, and I'm thinking to myself: Geez! I should stop ruining my life searching for answers I'm never gonna get and just enjoy it while it lasts. And, you know, after-who knows? Maybe there is something, nobody really knows. I know that maybe is a very slim reed to hang your whole life on, but that's the best we have.

Woody Allen

I feel that life is divided into the horrible and the miserable. That's the two categories. The horrible are like, I don't know, terminal cases, you know, and blind people, crippled. I don't know how they get through life. It's amazing to me. And the miserable is everyone else. So you should be thankful that you're miserable, because that's very lucky, to be miserable.

Woody Allen

Photons have mass? I didn’t even know they were Catholic.

Woody Allen

I have no idea what I am doing but incompetence has never prevented me from plunging in with enthusiasm.

Woody Allen

I’m going to kill myself. I should go to Paris and jump off the Eiffel Tower. I’ll be dead. you know, in fact, if I get the Concorde, I could be dead three hours earlier, which would be perfect. Or wait a minute. It -- with the time change, I could be alive for six hours in New York but dead three hours in Paris. I could get things done, and I could also be dead.