Famous Quotes & Sayings

Chelsea Handler

My feeling is, if a dog is that hard up to break free, let it go. It's like a boyfriend who wants to break up. We all know the old adage "If you set someone free, and he never comes back, then he was never yours." I understand the main fear with setting dogs loose is they could get hit by a car, but so could an ex boyfriend. That's just a chance you have to take.

Chelsea Handler

I can remember my first one-night stand like it was yesterday. Well, maybe not the first. Or the second... or the fifth. I'll just begin with what I can remember and not concern myself with order.

Chelsea Handler

I don't like the word 'alcoholic'. I like to think of myself as an advanced drinker.

Chelsea Handler

Our relationship finally ended when he took to waking me up in the wee hours o the morning when he would go surfing. He thought it might be fun to have me come watch. "Fun for who?" I wanted to ask. i had never asked him to come to Happy Hour and watch me drink.

Chelsea Handler

Then a homeless man with a dog approached us and put his hand out. This happens to be something that I have a real problem with: homeless people with pets who approach you for food when they have a perfectly delicious dog standing right there?

Chelsea Handler

I think we can all agree that sleeping around is a great way to meet people.

Chelsea Handler

My mother told me that life isn't always about pleasing yourself and that sometimes you have to do things for the sole benefit of another human being. I completely agreed with her, but reminded her that that was what blow jobs were for.

Charlotte Whitton

Whatever women do, they must do twice as well as men to be thought half as good. Luckily, this is not difficult.

Chase Utley

[Clayton Kershaw ] is intense. He's a competitor.He's extremely fun to play behind.

Chase Utley

I figured out that there are occasions where you have to get pumped up and take charge, situations where you have to have fun and situations where you need to settle down.

Charlotte Ross

I've never played a character where I've had so much fun on the physical end. I don't want to say I like it too much but it's fun having a gun on you and getting to manhandle men.

Charlotte Ronson

I'm not a make-up person, but I love wearable products that are easy to use, with fun packaging

Charlyne Yi

Interviewing is tough, especially if you don't know what you're looking for.

Charlotte Rampling

I think you have to earn beauty. You can use it or abuse it however you want when you`re young. It`s a God-given gift. You have a visiting card - you can go into any room and someone will come and talk to you. But I`ve always thought from very early on that you have to be careful with that - not being vain or narcissistic. Have fun, but don`t be obsessed with it.

Charlie Rowe

Obviously, I'm quite young and I haven't really thought about what films I'd like to go into yet. I love challenging films, really. I'd prefer to do some gritty, challenging roles. That would be awesome, and really fun. I want to be as diverse as possible.

Charlie Pierce

The perfect lover is one who turns into a pizza at 4:00 A.M.

Charlie Sheen

But you can't focus on things that matter if all you've been is asleep for forty years. Funny how sleep rhymes with sheep. You know.

Charlie Sheen

I saw 28 Days. I don't remember rehab being like a day camp or being that funny. Rehab is a dumping ground. It's a big landfill.

Charles Woodson

I couldn't believe it. That was the first time I had ever seen somebody celebrate for a whole 40-second clock. That was ridiculous.

Charles Kuralt

It was so much fun to have the freedom to wander America, with no assignments. For 25 or 30 years I never had an assignment. These were all stories I wanted to do myself.

Aisha Tyler

If you haven't noticed yet, working sucks. Unless you are a racecar driver or an astronaut or Beyonce, working is completely and utterly devoid of awesome. It is hard, it lasts all day, the lighting is generally fluorescent, and, apparently, drinking at your desk is frowned upon. If you ever needed to ruin someone's fun, I mean really poop a party, just move things to the workplace. Fun terminated.

Aisha Tyler

You can only really learn from failure ... To win, you need to fail, and fail hard.

Bobbi Brown

The best thing about being 55 is that I know enough now to know what I want and what I don't want-and what I want is to have fun.

Bob Monkhouse

My wife said, 'Can my mother come down for the weekend?' So I said, 'Why?' And she said, 'Well, she's been up on the roof two weeks already.'

Bob Monkhouse

I'm rather relaxed about death. From quite an early age I've regarded it as part of the deal, the unwritten guarantee that comes with your birth certificate.

Bob Monkhouse

Dulwich College takes me back after seventy years: My Mum must have written one hell of a sick note!

Bob Monkhouse

A tom cat hijacked a plane, stuck a pistol into the pilot's ribs and demanded: 'Take me to the canaries'.

Bob Monkhouse

A miniature village in Bournemouth caught fire and the flames could be seen nearly three feet away.

Bob Monkhouse

I got my start in silent radio.

Bob Monkhouse

Marriage is an investment which pays dividends if you pay interest.

Bob Monkhouse

Where do the homeless have 90 per cent of their accidents?

Bob Monkhouse

What do gardeners do when they retire?

Bob Monkhouse

My wife was fitted with a coil. For about 18 months I hated it! She used to pick up CB signals.