Ambrose Gwinett Bierce
Ambrose Gwinett Bierce
Ambrose Gwinnett Biercewas an American editorialist, journalist, short story writer, fabulist, and satirist. He wrote the short story "An Occurrence at Owl Creek Bridge" and compiled a satirical lexicon, The Devil's Dictionary. His vehemence as a critic, his motto "Nothing matters", and the sardonic view of human nature that informed his work, all earned him the nickname "Bitter Bierce"...
action again avoid clearer mind obtain perils relation shall view yesterday
REFLECTION, n. An action of the mind whereby we obtain a clearer view of our relation to the things of yesterday and are able to avoid the perils that we shall not again encounter.
american-journalist device individual ingenious obtaining profit
Corporation. An ingenious device for obtaining individual profit without individual responsibility.
behind hiding
PRUDE, n. A bawd hiding behind the back of her demeanor.
clean shirt
DISSEMBLE, v.i. To put a clean shirt upon the character.Let us dissemble. --Adam
amazed amazing avowed came cried crossed crowd deaf deep eyes face fascinated feet friend grow heard improbable liar limb melancholy mum natural others raised sat save seemed single solemn surprise tale thrive turned voice
IMPROBABILITY, n.His tale he told with a solemn face And a tender, melancholy grace. Improbable 'twas, no doubt, When you came to think it out, But the fascinated crowd Their deep surprise avowed And all with a single voice averred'Twas the most amazing thing they'd heard -- All save one who spake never a word, But sat as mum As if deaf and dumb, Serene, indifferent and unstirred. Then all the others turned to him And scrutinized him limb from limb -- Scanned him alive; But he seemed to thrive And tranquiler grow each minute, As if there were nothing in it."What! what!" cried one, "are you not amazed At what our friend has told?" He raised Soberly then his eyes and gazed In a natural way And proceeded to say, As he crossed his feet on the mantel-shelf:"O no --not at all; I'm a liar myself.
beyond dreaded dwelling financial savages tribe
CREDITOR, n. One of a tribe of savages dwelling beyond the Financial Straits and dreaded for their desolating incursions.
accused detain
ARREST, v.t. Formally to detain one accused of unusualness.
american-journalist denying himself man temptation weak yields
Abstainer - a weak man who yields to the temptation of denying himself a pleasure.
ancient awful bad bold dig greeks looked maiden proves ruins stone swear turned
GORGON, n.The Gorgon was a maiden bold Who turned to stone the Greeks of old That looked upon her awful brow. We dig them out of ruins now, And swear that workmanship so bad Proves all the ancient sculptors mad.
degree
MORE, adj. The comparative degree of too much.
known speech
HARANGUE, n. A speech by an opponent, who is known as an harrangue- outang.
knows lips railway smashed specialist wine
CONNOISSEUR, n. A specialist who knows everything about something and nothing about anything else. An old wine-bibber having been smashed in a railway collision, some wine was pouted on his lips to revive him. ""Pauillac, 1873,"" he murmured and died.
civilian except factory farm impressive johnson martial pursuit soldier spectacle uniform words
RECRUIT, n. A person distinguishable from a civilian by his uniform and from a soldier by his gait.Fresh from the farm or factory or street, His marching, in pursuit or in retreat, Were an impressive martial spectacle Except for two impediments --his feet. --Thompson Johnson
account believed bucket holy inhabiting last originally seen
SALAMANDER, n. Originally a reptile inhabiting fire; later, an anthropomorphous immortal, but still a pyrophile. Salamanders are now believed to be extinct, the last one of which we have an account having been seen in Carcassonne by the Abbe Belloc, who exorcised it with a bucket of holy water.