Daniel Tosh
Daniel Tosh
Daniel Dwight Tosh is an American comedian, television host, actor, writer, and executive producer. He is known for his deliberately offensive and controversial style of black comedy, as the host of the Comedy Central television show Tosh.0 and as the star of stand-up comedy tours and specials...
NationalityAmerican
ProfessionComedian
Date of Birth29 May 1975
CityBoppard, Germany
CountryUnited States of America
funny pregnancy home
Sometimes, when I'm feeling down because nothing seems to be going right, I like to take a home pregnancy test. Then I can say, Hey, at least I'm not pregnant
funny people firsts
Here's what I tell people now when they come to my shows: 'First of all, thank you for stimulating the economy, or at least my economic package.'
country marijuana smoking
I don't know what's more embarrassing in this country, that Michael Phelps fell from the graces for smoking marijuana or that you looked up to a swimmer in the first place?
fun games metallica
It's all fun and games until someone gets a boner.
acceptance awful sense-of-humor
You can accept that things are awful and still have a sense of humor about it.
expression hail yeah
I came up with my own expression. I like to make it hail. Yeah. That's when you throw change on sluts.
mean goal laughing
I mean my goal is to get Michael Richards to do stand up at the Laugh Factory to an all black audience.
children night perfect
Somebody bought me a Snuggie as a joke gift. Haha, the joke's on you, I enjoy it. I toss and turn at night, finally a blanket that's like, 'I'm going to keep you warm.' It's like having a small child with polio keep you in a full nelson - the perfect pressure.
dog care way
Finding my dog's g spot is taking way longer than I would care to admit.
blow enough passing
If you snort enough blow, any lane is a passing lane.
red-flags dating china
I will not date a woman from China, because that is a big red flag.
daughter princess years
You know why they say that, that models are too skinny? Because parents are horrible, they can't tell their sixteen year old daughter she's not really a princess, well guess what, I can.
christian
Scattergories is second base for Christians.
weekend night cities
I really don't work a whole lot as far as touring, but I do stand-up every night of my life, no matter where I am. It's really made the touring a lot less grueling. A lot of people get to this level and they're like, Now I do four cities in one week and they tour nonstop. I'm like, No, that sounds miserable. I'll just do two weekends a month. But whenever I'm in some awful place geographically, it's no longer that awful, because you've got the Internet and television.