Daniel Tosh
Daniel Tosh
Daniel Dwight Tosh is an American comedian, television host, actor, writer, and executive producer. He is known for his deliberately offensive and controversial style of black comedy, as the host of the Comedy Central television show Tosh.0 and as the star of stand-up comedy tours and specials...
NationalityAmerican
ProfessionComedian
Date of Birth29 May 1975
CityBoppard, Germany
CountryUnited States of America
soccer kids punishment
I've always thought having a kid that played soccer would be the worst punishment. After watching 3 min of water polo I stand corrected.
expression hail yeah
I came up with my own expression. I like to make it hail. Yeah. That's when you throw change on sluts.
mean goal laughing
I mean my goal is to get Michael Richards to do stand up at the Laugh Factory to an all black audience.
new-york crash planes
How come New York gets all the cool plane crashes?
cyclists enjoy hood
The day I notice a cyclist obey a stop sign is the day I'll stop enjoying watching them bounce off my hood.
versions
Yes, I am aware that I am the gayer version of Jeff Lewis.
children night perfect
Somebody bought me a Snuggie as a joke gift. Haha, the joke's on you, I enjoy it. I toss and turn at night, finally a blanket that's like, 'I'm going to keep you warm.' It's like having a small child with polio keep you in a full nelson - the perfect pressure.
ends should jokes
I'm aware that I should end a joke with the good part, I choose not too.
dog care way
Finding my dog's g spot is taking way longer than I would care to admit.
couple men white-man
Saw myself naked in front of a mirror a couple days ago - that's not the joke, that's what we called the setup. I saw myself naked, and I said, 'Holy cow, I'm 'The White Man.' I've heard a lot of bad things about you, cracka.
blow enough passing
If you snort enough blow, any lane is a passing lane.
red-flags dating china
I will not date a woman from China, because that is a big red flag.
daughter princess years
You know why they say that, that models are too skinny? Because parents are horrible, they can't tell their sixteen year old daughter she's not really a princess, well guess what, I can.
hands laughing people
Thank you people that are laughing with your hand away from your mouth. That joke is clearly not for everyone, but I enjoy watching people that don't laugh make the people that do laugh feel shitty about themselves.