Demetri Martin

Demetri Martin
Demetri Evan Martinis an American comedian, actor, artist, musician, writer, and humorist. He is best known for his work as a stand-up comedian, being a contributor on The Daily Show, and his Comedy Central show Important Things with Demetri Martin...
NationalityAmerican
ProfessionComedian
Date of Birth25 May 1973
CityNew York City, NY
CountryUnited States of America
interesting would-be bowling
Bowling would be more interesting if it were slightly uphill.
home next seats
I love having an open seat next to me on the train. What's even better is when my seat is open too because I just stayed home.
dancing looks spiders
Sometimes it looks like I'm dancing, but it's just that I walked into a spider web.
popcorn results explosions
Popcorn is one of the only situations in which you eat the result of an explosion.
fart relate jokes
Some of them relate to farts but they are not fart jokes. They would just be a fart in the joke but it's about something else...
grandchildren eras someday
Someday I will tell my grandchildren that I lived in the era when OK was abbreviated to K.
struggle panic bed
Right now someone out there is struggling and starting to panic because they can't get out of a tempurpedic bed.
hate interesting stranger
To get strangers to hate you even faster, crank up the volume on that very interesting ringtone of yours.
work-out thursday sometimes
It's Thursday and it really feels like a Thursday. Sometimes things just work out.
thinking dancing bears
I think it would be worse to get mauled by a dancing bear than just a regular bear because you can't totally blame the dancing bear.
jealous laughing bird
Sometimes I see a bird fly by and I feel jealous. But then other times I see a bird fly into a closed window and I feel laughing.
thinking ears tone
I'm not a lawmaker, but I was thinking that if you have a really loud ring tone, maybe you should be stabbed in the ear?
please whole
I would like to have windshield wipers that do the whole windshield, please.
hate shooting satisfying
Skeet shooting is probably more satisfying if you really hate skeets.