Demetri Martin
Demetri Martin
Demetri Evan Martinis an American comedian, actor, artist, musician, writer, and humorist. He is best known for his work as a stand-up comedian, being a contributor on The Daily Show, and his Comedy Central show Important Things with Demetri Martin...
NationalityAmerican
ProfessionComedian
Date of Birth25 May 1973
CityNew York City, NY
CountryUnited States of America
halloween holiday my-favorite
Halloween's my favorite holiday because you don't have to spend it with your family.
tape realizing invisible
There is probably more invisible tape out there than we realize.
comedy reason getting-laid
The reason you often get in comedy is because you're not getting laid.
real choices infinite
I equals all of the ifs added up over time. The ifs, those are the possibilities; that's infinite for all of us. Every day there are just millions of them. Time, that's finite for each of us; there is no question there. Maybe if you divide choices by the amount of time you have, the real I can emerge, depending upon those choices.
ohio average guy
Statistics indicate that the average American is a guy named Brian who lives in Ohio.
want today forget
Don't forget to turn your clocks back today if you don't want your clocks to be set to the right time.
beach fate balls
I have never been in a bad mood and near a beach ball at the same time. Causation? Correlation? Or fate?
dwarves toss faster
We do not allow dwarf tossing. If you toss a dwarf, the dwarf will be tossed right back at you, but faster.
voice next best-things
Brought to you by raising your voice. The next best thing to being right.
nails bites
I am what I eat. And I am this especially when I bite my nails.
bravery thesaurus daring
I am bravery. I am courage. I am valor. I am daring. I am holding a thesaurus.
distance ocean talking
My friend asked me I ever swam with dolphins. I was like, 'Yeah, of course. What distance are we talking about from the dolphins? Because the last time I was in the ocean, I'm pretty sure I swam with most of them.'