Demetri Martin
Demetri Martin
Demetri Evan Martinis an American comedian, actor, artist, musician, writer, and humorist. He is best known for his work as a stand-up comedian, being a contributor on The Daily Show, and his Comedy Central show Important Things with Demetri Martin...
NationalityAmerican
ProfessionComedian
Date of Birth25 May 1973
CityNew York City, NY
CountryUnited States of America
boss want colleagues
I don't want to be my own boss. I want to be my own colleague.
trying sunglasses credibility
To remove all credibility from what you're saying try wearing sunglasses on your forehead.
important tiny small-business
Small businesses are important, but so are tiny businesses.
vampire breaths
Vampires probably don't have great breath.
halloween years giving
Halloween: the day each year when strangers give you even more specific reasons to dislike them based on what they are wearing.
mean villain broccoli
Villains fear me because I am unpredictable and broccoli. See what I mean?
blessing count-your-blessings loud
Count your blessings, but not out-loud, at the top of your lungs.
thinking interesting people
If only loud people were even half as interesting as they think they are.
children men clothes
The clothes make the man. The children working in sweatshops make the clothes. Therefore, the children working in sweatshops make the man.
circles fire truck
Fire truck with back end on fire drives really fast in circles.
people four-agreements problem
The problem with most people, is that they are most people.
space want astronaut
I want to launch a globe into space just to mess with the astronauts.
ponchos four minutes
At any minute, I am four minutes from a poncho.
moving opposites addiction
A refrigerator is the opposite of a drug addict, because a refrigerator starts in a box and then moves to a house.